Boned in Shoreditch

I was breaking quarantine in Shoreditch. Thankfully all the hipsters have abandoned it due to a mixture of virus and a decline in the quality of craft beer.

I said to my mate Ed,

"Why the fuck do we keep coming here? It's full of the scum of the earth, the prices are outrageous and there's not even any dancing anymore. Last week I tried to break up a fight and the guy getting the shit kicked out of him told me to fuck off. that's how shit it is."

Ed Stopped still.

"To answer that, First answer why there are'nt any hipsters anymore."

"What do you mean? I literally said why in the first paragraph..."

"Well you were wrong. First of all, my name is an anagram." I tried to puzzle it out....

Oh my god.

Ed. De. DEAD!!!!

He had been a tall skeleton all this time!

He laughed boneily.

"That's right. And the reason that we have no hipsters is because we've been stealing all their hips. The Reason it's full of pricks now is that we want their boners."

"So why am I here?" I said, backing away.

"You're here because this story isn't really very funny and is a marked degradation in effort and originality from what I know you're capable of, so I'm going to take your funnybone, so that a skeleton can take the mike and actually post something worth reading. Seriously, this is a fucking shit ending."

And with that, he ripped out my funnybone and the ending was just as shit as he said it'd be.

---

Credited to scannerofcrap 

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