Donkey Kong.exe スソ衛

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The first thing you are gonna say is that this "story" is gonna have those blood and gore. What a joke. If you know Nintendo and Rare well, then you would already known that they don't do that. Where am I going with this?

Now it seems like a stupid question, but, do you remember Donkey Kong Country? Its that monkey game where you collect bananas, fight crocodiles, and fly out of barrels. You already know what it is, and why should I tell you more? You may have to google it yourself.

I been feeling depressed after many events happened to me, and I just wanted to feel happy again. Just like how family would be happy of me, but I didn't know what to do, or have anyone to contact to relate. I don't want to get into some personal detail, but I have a friend that works for Nintendo that deals with fan games and do that copyright take down thing with it. Sure Nintendo doesn't do that much of it now, because they saw what fans of other company's are doing, but they'll might do it here and there. Any who, my friend has sent me a link to a website that has a few links for each computer. It states about this being a remake of Donkey Kong Country, and him knowing how much I love the Donkey Kong games, he asked me to play it. He says it might cope with my depression, and whatever.

Of course, I downloaded it. This took a while to download though, so I decided to wait until the next day. I mean, he did sent it to me around 9 AM, so I needed some sleep. Once I awoken up, I hopped onto my laptop and connected it to the tv, and begun to play the file. The file in question was under the name "Donkeykong.exe"

The game starts up with the Nintendo 64 loading screen, then coming into a remake of the first level in the game. But here's the thing, the background wasn't the typical DKC background, with all of the jungle stuff around it. It had this 80s background, while the game keeps on glitching and glitching and glitching. There were no baddies, just bananas and banana chunks. At the end of the level, the one with the big cave, the outside of it was filled with banana chunks. And for the whole time, a slowed yet relaxing version of the DKC theme played in the background. Once I finished the level, the screen changed into a render of Funky Kong on a pink background, next to a gray box that says "VIDEO GAMES". The level repeats, but this time I got to play as Diddy Kong. You know the kong letters in each level of the original game? Yeah, it replaced the bananas and the banana chunks. The level was still the same as the last one, but exit was different. The Kong Letters can be seen making up a bunch of words, which mentioned how I was feeling at the time. The same Funky Kong screen played and I ended up into a corruption of a mess. I was playing as Cranky Kong now, with a cropped picture above me that was one of Cranky's lines. It read: "All Of This Game Play Is Too Much For Me". I suddenly realized how much I been indoors, taking to myself and crying in my own sleep thinking about the chances of "Why doesn't anybody like me?" and so on and so forth. I tried walking to the end of the level like last time, but I was blocked by a invisible wall. The only other thing was the Kong's Banana Horde. So, I went in there, and it had that Funky Kong loading screen.

And then, it was just changed into black. Like if the game crashed, or something. I was about to get out of the game, until I noticed something; I saw Cranky. He was falling down until he reached to the middle of the screen. That same render of Funky Kong kept on showing up and once Cranky got to the middle, it started to play all of these Donkey Kong commercials. And it kept on playing that for what seemed like for hours, and hours, and hours. A vaporwave song was playing in the background, and I noticed what everybody in the commercials was feeling. They were having fun, enjoying each other, and over all... caring for eachother....

The screen then glitched back into the Funky Kong loading screen, and loaded me into what the background to one of the water levels of the game, with a Funky Kong sprite at the bottom, with the text:

"Donkey Kong Is Dead, Vaporwave Is Dead, The World Keeps Turning, Life Goes On"

It was at that moment that all I can feel now was, being happy. That game, weirdly, coped with my depression. The point of the game wasn't about winning, or losing. Heck, I didn't even die at the end! It was about enjoying life at its fullest, and living it through. I got out of the game after the credits, because the game repeats itself, I gotten another file. I never was sent the file, but I thought it came with the game, so I didn't mind it.

The song was a slowed down version of "I'm Nobody's Hero" From the Donkey Kong Country Show. I think the reason why the song came with the game is because that, I'm Nobody's Hero, I'm my own hero.



Credited to Sonic Pepsi

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