Darthog the hedgehog

One day I was certainly eating popcorn and enjoying the new sonic movie, untill a blood cartridge of sonic 1 was in my popcorn bag, as confused as I am I said "what is this?" Nobody answered, and I putted in my sega Genesis, the title screen came up, but it was slowed and low pitched, I said "where's the sega?" I shrugged it out anyway, so basically a data select came up, and I said "there's no data select in sonic 1!" So I picked tails and instead of green hill zone the darn zone was called "Hell zone" so I played through out the zone, but I saw a fake sonic costume maybe darthog is another sonic.exe? Nobody knows, and so darthog grabbed tails, and a black screen came up, with the setence "want to play an game?" And instead of going to the next act, the next zone is called "Find" they're were 2 acts of it, as the first act, it was green hill but it was red grass instead of green, as I saw tails shaking in fear, when I pressed right, he said "please, don't go further, I beg of you Simmons!" Then I said "but..I'm not Simmons" but pressed right anyway, and then after just holding right for... 78 seconds, I got through the fire ring, it putted tails in the second act, where I ACTUALLY get to play a level, then a mysterious voice that is deep and scary said "ok time is up!" It made me wonder, what time? So tails got chased by darthog, then tails got killed, and then in a black background and some text that said "You were too slow, let's try another time" then I played as knuckles! Then for the zone name the zone name is "Saigme" but glitched, it was just a straight line with some loops, then knuckles got through the loops, then darthog grabbed knuckles's head, then darthog said "Knuckles, if you want your emeralds so bad, how about you fight me for it." Then they fought, and knuckles got tired after 30 seconds, then knuckles got on the ground and cried, then Darthog killed knuckles via eating them with an incredibly large mouth that has opened, then went on to eggman, the name of this zone was "Died egg" where eggman goes through 89 loops, and after going though those 89 loops, darthog later pulled out a gun, then darthog said "Now now, don't be too feisty little egg, after all you're just growing into your 60's" then eggman said "I am not going to listen to you, is that a gun" then shoots eggman, after that it sent me back to the data select, then it showed a black background with darthog shamelessly looking away from the camera, then the text "I can't forgive you" appeared, then it infected my computer, I don't know why but it's terrifying, I boot up the computer and put my password and everything, and then it showed my notebook and spammed "I can't forgive you" over and over.

Moral of the story: don't pick up a bloody sonic 1 cartridge..

Comments • 0

Loading comments...