Fraud Sword

"My name is Mr. Pickle, but you can call me Jim", said Mr Pickle. "I have an amazing business opportunity for you, bucko" he said, three teeth missing while his eyepatch glistened in the lamplight of New York. The smog bellowed heavily, making a musty smell that was almost indescribable.

"What's the idea?" said Benny Boomer. "I like the cut of your jib, and really would appreciate being let in on this little deal of yours"

"Well, I'm going to break into that swooooord shop over there and steal a swoooord"

"That sounds like the worst idea I've ever heard, how is this even a business opportunity. You're an idiot Jim. One of the dumbest idiots I've ever met in my life"

"Well just give me 3 bucks it's that simple Benny Boy, if you don't you might not get in on this action. Wink wink nudge nudge"

"Ok fine here's your 3 bucks now impale yourself like an idiot on the window"

At this point, Jim crashed through the window setting off all the alarms. The trick was NOT to take the sword. You see, the whole scheme is to PRETEND to steal the sword and run away. Do this with multiple schmucks over the course of an afternoon you can make a tidy 9 bucks. That's an honest man's way of not making a livin' I tells ya'.

Anyway, Jim stabbed himself on the sword, all of the glass. It was a real mess. Blood, everywhere. He stopped being able to see because of the blood loss and soon passed out.

"Ooooh this was not a good idea and ooh no my blood oh god it's all everywhere"

"You're an absolute fuck" said Mr Boomer, before looking around cautiously for a cab to sneak off into and go to the furthest reaches known to mankind.

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Credited to MrAntiAnti 

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