Frayesh Lettuce

I browsed YouTube searching for commercials from the late 1960s and found a McDonald's commercial - it was the introduction of the Big Mac sandwich. My friend watched the commercial quite a few times and loved it. He was licking his lips at the site of the sesame seeds placed on the bun, topping the selection featuring a bun, beef patty, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, beef patty, onions and the middle part.

But when I viewed it, the commercial was different. The announcer was replaced with this huge man with blood oozing from his eyes and thin muscles. He said to me, eyes staring into my direction: "Don't buy this sandwich. It will give you eternal demons and gain you some weight, getting yourself a step closer to heart failure, which could lead to death, which could lead to being tortured by the devil forever. I am a demon myself," he spoke as he started licking the blood from his eyes.

As he went through explaining the sandwich, he was screaming so badly that my eardrums had been thrown out of my ear sockets. The mysterious person organising the sandwich was organising the sandwich like this: "a bun made from pulled out baby teeth with the bloody bits left in, two cooked lungs crushed into patties, special urine, dead plant, rotten cheese with eyeballs, a fresh pickle...with bones of a pig's ear, rotten onion, the middle part and the sesame seed crown that was instead a human's severed head.

I threw up all over my shirt, computer, and legs, feeling really out of place. I could feel the demons crawling into my brain. They were stabbing at the memory, trying to dig out all the good memories like the time I went to Burger King and licked the sesame seeds from the burgers that other people ate, whether it was on their hand, leg or on their thick lips.

Collapsing onto the floor, I went into a coma, only for it to be a dream that I had. I was relieved until - I saw the palm of my hand. The numbers "666" were cut into my palm, leaving the veins deactivated and blood spreading out from my hand and onto the bed sheets. Now I promise to never watch that commercial again nor go to McDonald's for fast food. In fact, I will never get fast food again. Screw that crap.

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