Fucking a Ghost
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NSFW WARNING
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Lately I've been reminiscing about my college days. You know how they're supposed to be the best days of your life? Well, not for me. Something terrible happened during a game of Truth or Dare and I've been living with the consequences ever since.
"Hey, Sabrina, truth or dare?"
"Umm," Sabrina thought, "I'll take... truth!"
"Ok," said Janey, who was running the game, "who do you have a crush on?"
Sabrina immediately crumbled. She blushed uncontrollably and forfeited the game. She was no competition.
Next up was me, David.
"David. Truth or dare?"
I replied dare of course.
"It's going to have to be a good one." Said Janey, "Dave has taken all his dares so far."
"Ooh, I know." Chimed in Brad, "Why don't you, like, kill somebody?"
"Kill somebody like Donny?" I said, pointing to Donny who was next in the circle of the game and my main competition.
"Yeah, kill Donny. I dare you."
Immediately I jumped on Donny and tried to get a grip around his neck. He was somewhat surprised which made it easier, but he did try to put up a fight by swinging his head back into my teeth. After kneeing him in the back as hard as he could and getting a better hold, he began to struggle less. When he grew limp, I picked up a nearby lamp and smacked it repeatedly into his skull. I then used the cord to garrotte any remaining life from his body.
I sat back down.
"Ok, Barbara." Said Janey, "You're next. Truth or dare?"
"I'll take a truth, please."
"Barbara... who do you have a crush on?"
"Oh," Barbara thought about it, "I was going to say Donny, but since now he's dead... I'd have to say young Tom Cruise."
Slowly the game continued until it was only me and Barbara left. She had answered young Tom Cruise 7 times in a row and they were quickly running out of good dares for me.
"I dunno Dave," said Janey, "why don't you... fuck a spooky creature? Fuck Roger the college dorm ghost."
I looked over to the fat basset hound, knowing that I had finally been beaten, by Barbara of all people.
"Can't do it." I sighed. "I jizzed pretty hard while I was murdering Donny earlier. Haven't got another one left in me. Plus it's like 2 a.m... I just don't think I can fuck a ghost right now."
"Ok, Barbara, looks like you win." Said Janey.
I still remember how everyone cheered for Barbara and jeered at me, made fun of me, for not being able to roger Roger.
I've had to live with that terrible memory of failure ever since. The stench of regret never leaves me. Every day I fuck a ghost to try and make up for it, but nobody cares. Nobody cares.
Credited to koalazeus
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