GameStop Copypasta

So I stroll into my local game stop looking to buy a copy of Persona no Embremu: Waifu Jam! Gaiden. I grab the game and take it to the charming maiden at the register. I say "pardon me, milady.... But could you ring me up? A shame I don't have your number, or I'd ring you up instead..." She giggles and takes the game, blushing as her fingers brush mine due to my fingerless gloves.

Her eyes widen as she reads the games title "Wow, I've never seen anyone buy this before! You must have special taste!". I smile and ready a witty response when suddenly a voice rings from behind. "Hahaha look at what this dork is buying! That's not Call of Duty! What a piece of shit!" I quickly turn around, my cloak billowing behind me, to discern the source of this rude outburst.

Standing before me is generic dudebro caricature with a sports team cap and "The guy that beat you up that one time behind the school in early October" shirt just standing over the guffawing.

"Excuse me sir... you may disparage my person if you wish, but it is untoward to swear in front of a lady."

"Fuck you asshole!" The man replied.

"As you wish..."

I quickly swing my cane into his kneecap before he can react, he bellows and charges forwards. I expertly sidestep him and the cashier screams as he crashes into the counter. I draw my sword-cane and mutter a quiet oath as I drive it deep into his back.

"...requiescat in pace..."

As I clean my blade the girl walks out from behind the counter, twirling her hair with her fingers. "So...maybe you'd like to come over to my place and play that game sometime... ?" the cashier asked me.

"No thanks milady, It's single player only. Besides..." I sheath my sword.

"You're not my type"

I skate away on my Heelys into the sunset.

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