He lived in a pineapple under the sea

Hello dear Reddit. I apologize for any spelling and grammar mistakes. English is not my first language.

Two nights ago, I unwrapped a new sponge. I used it to wash dishes after dinner and put the sponge in a basket beside the sink. But when I returned later, the sponge was inside the sink. I put the sponge back in the basket. I looked again and the sponge was standing up in the basket. It was very strange.

The next morning, the sponge was not there. I searched for it under the dish rack but it was not there. Who would have taken a sponge?

I found my sponge in the bathroom sink. I spoke to it. "Sponge, why are you there?"

I was very scared because the sponge grew eyes and lips. The eyes were round like coins and the mouth had two teeth. I was even more scared because the sponge was wearing pants and a red power tie.

"Boy, this sink needs a wash," said the sponge. "Use me! I'm ready."

I was so very scared but it was also true: the sink was dirty. So I added soap and washed the sink with the talking sponge.

The sponge started to laugh in a horrible manner. "Bahahahahaha! That was fun!"

I was so scared I tossed the sponge in the toilet. It did not flush. It only clogged the toilet and I was forced to pull it out with my hand.

The sponge now had long arms and hands! The hands had four fingers each! Why? Why it has arms and hands, and why only four fingers?

"Sponge, you are cursed," I said. The sponge made spooky ghost sounds. I hit the sponge.

"Ouch!" Then it threatened me. "I know karate! Hi-ya!"

"Devil sponge, you do not threaten me. This is my house." I took the sponge and cut it up in the garbage disposal.

After this, I felt sad. I feel I had killed a living thing, and that is wrong. I prayed to God for forgiveness and searched for answers on the internet.

While searching I was very surprised. The talking sponge is a famous cartoon! Now I feel even more sad. I have killed a beloved children's character. May God forgive me.

Then I started to feel strange. I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror and saw I am now very yellow. That is not good. My pores looked very big as well. I decided to call a doctor the next morning.

But when I woke up my pores are so big I can put a finger through one! I look like Swiss cheese! Each time I look in the mirror, I look more and more unlike myself. I am now completely square and I ripped my pants.

The doctor said to make a appointment and go to hospital if I am very sick. I do not know if I am very sick. I do not feel ill. I am only different.

I think I am becoming sponge.

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Credited to attacked_by_a_swan 

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