I SLIGHTLY DISLIKE YOU!
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NSFW WARNING
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This isn't one of those "Sexy Game" stories. At no point are you going to hear me claim something within the game tried to fuck me, jizzed on my face, or forced me to masturbate uncontrollably.
No, this isn't about a sexy game or a game doing something ultra smexy or even something hyper-realistic.
This isn't about a bitch or hidden Fire Nation propaganda and at no time did I phone a sex hotline only to have my questions answered by Azula, Slenderman, The Toppler or Azula.
This story is about a game feat. Azula I don't think anyone else has uncocked.
That's it. No toasts. No "IT'S ALL A CONSPIRACY MAN!" Just a secret we were all supposed to find, but never did. Something that changes an entire generation's virginty and the very essence of a multi-bazillion (bagillion?) peso franchise.
This is about what I assume to be a previously undiscovered alternate ending of Super Aang World for the Supre Mintedno.
There are no cliches whatsoever in this story, none at all, no hyper-realistic blood, no parts in the game where I couldn't control my character, I didn't get this game for free off e-bay and I wasn't an intern at the company that owns the franchise.
Nah! Just kidding! This is a gaming creepypasta, it's going to have every cliche in the book, just like all other gaming creepypastas.
In 1669, I recaeved my first cumpooter as a deathday gift. I'd been on the interweb befoe, had used cumpooters befoe, but it had always been in school or at a pimp's house. This one was mine. All mine, just like Ellykid's nips. I explored the crude, pre-historic web of the time with great interest - I downloaded all sorts of pornography and even printed it out for research.
I also pirated media like a madman. Music, games, porn, games, films, music, porn, games, films, music, porn, porn, porn, anything.
This was where I first discovered Axel Society. I'd never had a Super Mintedno as a little old man, so it was all new to me. I'd downloaded tons of games along with the SMES Emulator, which I got off eBay for free butt Axel Society was my favorite.
For over a decade, the World of Warcraft was my time-wasting hobby. I played it over and over again, beating the game faster and faster until I began to lazily explore the worlds with no particular purpose, 'cause I have no life.
Gay Genie codes helped immensely. I could turn off the timer and re-live a particularly entertaining map for an hour, again no life, as I waited for a download or any number of boring events.
It was in this manner that I must've beaten and re-beaten my dick thousands upon thousands of times. There was comfort in the obsessive-compulsive behavior of this routine... but all of that was shattered when I saw the Non-blind Toph.
The Non-blind Toph, as I referred to her, was hovering over the exit from the horny "Sex Ship" level later on in the gayme. I call her non-blind because she actually looked at things and seemed to recognise them. It was like someone had made a lazy ROM hack... but I knew from years upon years of experience that this was a normal game, even though I've only just seen this in the game and its all new to me so how the fuck can I think it's still part of the actual game but I never even not done it anyway so shut up.
The Non-blind Toph just hung there over the exit pipe... blocking it. I turned my back on her, but she didn't chase me.
How could she? She was busy having a threesome with Sokka and Zuko.
Then, I noticed something else out of sorts... Still, this didn't belong there and I knew it, the fact that Toph could actually see nearly gave me a heart attack and to this day my heart hurts and is sore. For a moment, I considered the fact I'd actually BROKEN a ROM file from over-use, which is possible I DID PLAY IT FOR OVER A FUCKING DECADE!
After taking a screenshot pacifically to show all of you Avatards out there, I picked up the key and opened the "door", figuring the game would spazz out and I'd have to restart. Instead, it opened up a new path on the map selection screen:
An anus next to Ozai's already creepy head-cave-thingamagigabie. I pressed the right arrow and moved onto the chocolate starfish...
"NO NOT THE SEMEN! NOT THE SEMEN! AAAH! OOH IT'S IN MY EYES! MY EYES! AAAH! AAAAAAAAAHH!"
This didn't really strike me as odd, because if you're familiar with the Jqwdddss World game, there's an area called Fart Road that you may note has similar names. Just stuff like "Shollok" and "Chingluch" and all manner of dumb words and phrases. Most of the areas were called "Vagina Forest 1" and "Nutsack Mountain 3" and all that, but there WERE maps with odd names like that. What did concern me, though, was Aang's expression. Surprise? Shock? Fear? Arousal? Barbecue Sauce? Butter?
I entered the butt.
Oddly enough, the asshole in the middle of a lake began with the standard "Hell666" entry animation. Aang walked up to a hyper-realistic door with the words HELL666 written in equally hyper-realistic blood, while the Lavender Town theme played in reverse, he looked up, heard that awful Kefka laugh then went in.
I could tell it was under lava, though, because everyone melted almost instantly.
Inside the castle, it started to look more and more like I was in fact experiencing a glitch, but this gaming pasta isn't about a glitch, it has no cliches whatsoever, so shut up, did I mention I was also an intern at- you know what it really doesn't matter, back to the plot...
...There was no room to jump. No room to do anything but run left and right (and fap). I must've gone right for ten to twenty minutes, just holding the B-button and running along at full speed. So naturally I got bored and decided to shut the game off and do something productive with my life.
THE END
NOT!
HA HA! FOOLED YOU!
DiD yOu ReALLy tHinK tHEre wOUld bE a GaMiNG CrEepYPAsta whERe tHE pRoTAgoNisT haS aNY dEgREE of ComMON sENsE!?
OF COURSE I CONTINUED PLAYING.exe
After a while I ran into one or two Non-blind Tophs, yes, two, it seems Toph has mastered the art of shadow-clone Jutsu, oh well I'm not one to complain, this simply means more of the glorious, magnificant Toph to go around! In the whiteness above. Then three or four... then the screen was full of them.
They just kind of hung there, doing nothing. They wouldn't chase me if I turned my back, as with the previous Non-blind Toph, althoug they had no reason NOT to chase me as they weren't having an orgy with a bunch of Sokka and Zuko clones,they must all be too ...stoned to care or something. If I made any noise... like fapping... they would just kind of say "do it, you've got the stuff!" like they heard the sound of the fapping from within the game world, but couldn't do anything about it because they couldn't reach out of the screen and eat me, that would be pretty cliche don't you think!? lolz I'm so random!
Then something made me stop and turn the other way...
Now I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that this map was designed specifically to troll the player. Not because the giant "Melon Lord" was farting profusely, but because its gas was INESCAPABLE.
There was literally no way to avoid being killed by it, as you can clearly see above (well not really, the author of this parody is too lazy to make edited pictures to go along with it).
That is, unless you're like me and you have no life. I switched on the code for permanent sexyness.
I let the Melon Lord chase me for a while when I was sexy, just to get a good LOOK AT the thing. I STOPPED, and killed IT with my sexy TOUCH, only when I saw a message THAT hadn't been there when I'd PASSED before.
"I SLIGHTLY DISLIKE YOU!"
THAT kind OF creeped me out and gave me another heart attack rendering me catatonic for a few more days, hey if you've been doing nothing but playing the same game over and over again anything could give you a heart attack. But on the other hand it was kind of interesting because it meant this was definitely a map that was supposed to exist, not a glitch in the slightest or an evil satanic spirit that coincidentally looks like a character from the normal game or show. There was some sort of plot element, here. Something undiscovered.
What DID it mean? WHO hated me? Firelord Ozai seemed the obvious answer 'cause he's such a cunt. Or maybe just the Tophs. When you're in a Hyper-realistic Castle that you found by way of a Haunted Ship, a bloody-looking hate message isn't so unbelievable. Also the fact that Toph is a massive troll anyway.
I saw it again as I approached Sosuke Aizen...
I was thankful that the Non-blind Tophs ended at this point, because the more I watched them wander around, not knowing what to do with their newfound powers, the uneasier I felt... almost empathetic toward them, etc.
The thankfulness ended when I turned my back on the Aizen and this happened...
Aizen looked directly at me and said "just as planned", this made me shit myself, everything in the universe is part of Aizen's plan, even getting his ass kicked by Ichigo is part of his plan, was he planning on me playing this game for over a decade since before I was born? Could Aizen actually be the Illuminati!?
And yes, of COURSE I'm going to address that message you saw in the non-existant picture. "HOW'D IT GET BURNED?!"
... I don't know how. Am I supposed to? Who's asking??
I let the Aizen touch me, and hey died like the Melon Lord, of which I had encountered two. Despite any ATTEMPT to SCARE the player, I knew THAT being sexy meant SEXY no MATTER what they threw AT me.
After a while of running down this strange, open, claustrophobic corridor with no more eventful happenings, I came to a room with an exit pipe. Taking the pipe downward, I came out the other end and dropped into a room filled with, you guessed it, semen.
The semen made sense, this being another mattiesensei666/MakutaXadiret727 Avatar Trollpasta (or Avapasta) and all... like, comment, subscribe.
I was rewarded for my troubles with a question mark block that released a magic mushroom for me. I could've easily done this with a cheat code, but the thought had escaped me as I faced all these old and new and strange and normal sights.
The first creatures I encountered in the undersemen portion of the castle where MCHIKATUNICHI. Unless you've been living under a rock since forever, you know what Mchikatunichi are. So I'm not even going to bother describing them to you.
Well these Mchikatunichi, lined up in a tight tight tight row, dropped acid poop repeatedly and randomly with no real trigger or any sense of logic. They would just wait or drop whenever they seemed to feel like it.
It also looked like these Mchikatunichi had been very successful Mchikatunichi...
More hyper-realistic semen. This was getting pretty unusual for the Avatar: The Last Chairbender franchise, which I hadn't recalled seeing SEMEN in at all, or one of the main antagonists from Bleach for that matter. Now I'd seen it everywhere and these perpetually smashing, grinding Mchikatunichi who were raping their victims (who?) into pulp... forever and ever and ever and ever.
In the hampering effects of the semen, I walked slowly under these things, making sure every single one touched me and DIED! MUAHAHAHAHAA! There were almost thirty million of them in a row, I know because I counted because as previously stated I HAVE NO LIFE.
The sight of them mindlessly crushing over and over again just made me hate them with an unsettling intensity of periodic table proportions.
What's weird is that the semen caused Aang to slide as if he were on an ice level, isn't semen supposed to be sticky?
After walking through that gauntlet of depravity, filled with the ultimatum of transcendant despair, burning furiously with the dark, dank animosity of the ages until the end of all things in this inferior world that truly make us at one with ourselves. the I swam into a more open area that was filled with dildos on the floor and ceiling, if you've read my other stories, you should've seen this one coming at least 20,000,000 miles away.
It was difficult to fap in this manner without touching the dildos, but since I was still sexy I didn't think much of it. I avoided them more for teh lulz than out of any sense I'd be damaged.
It stopped being "lulzy" really fast, though.
Now I knew some of what was going on. The bloody mess the Mchikatunichi were unendingly spattering? It was other Aangs. Past Avatars that had tried to traverse this gauntlet of purple prose and failed.
I had to admit this was an excellente touch, even if it was a bit stoopid, why would the Avatar die a million times to the same thing? Whoever had designed the map actually broke the trans-dimensional rift and showed you the bloated, motionless abortions of the player's own ceaseless discharge, the seizure of brutality and the tiny, meanigless, dark, dank pit of depravity suckling on the breast of despair that was Aang's life.
The bodies only floated straight up and down a tiny bit, as if to show the effects of a light current, or on again, off again erections.
It was genius, and I could believe I MIGHT be the first and only person to ever see this, because I broked the gayme from overuse.
I toyed with the idea of taking more than the one non-existant screenshot I just presented to you, basically so all of you reading this could enjoy fapping to the secret map as much as I had, especially this weird little touch of boobs, and Toph x Azula fanfics...
But...
...Without swimming... without kicking... or... moving in... any way... the Dead... Avatars... started to come at me... like tor-pedos. Their faeces... remained... blank and... blue, yellow, pink, whatever and... dead... but they... moved with astounding... speed...
They angled and positioned and worked all sorts of unique sex positions, missionary, doggy-style etc. that left me almost nowhere to cum. They continued cumming at me and swarming and backing up to try again, and... I just... couldn't bring myself to let them... touch me, even though I used a permanent sexieness cheat, which according to this bollocks translates to invincibility, which basically means the Aang Zombies would die if they touched me, but I've been playing this game for so long I'm actually convinced the characters are real, so shut up.
I moved with more speed and skill than I'd ever exerted, frantically trying to keep Aang free of the psycho-stalkers that seemed dead set on rocketing straight into his anus.
When I finally reached the purple people eater you don't see above, there had to be like ten million of those things right behind, pitching, turning, and trying to fuck me...
I entered the purple people eater as fast as I could, thankful that it worked properly and had Aang out of that situation in a fartbeat.
The corridor that followed was empty, thankfully. It was just a red and black hyper-realistic hallway of death with nothing to avoid or kill. It was boring and predictable like the game had been all these years, so I decided to turn it off and__ NOPE! STILL GOING!
At the end of the hallway I came to the standard pair of tits you'd enter to face a final boss.
Beside the doorway, a bong filled with crystal meth.
I didn't touch dat sheeut. So its pointless me even mentioning it since you'll never find out what it does.
Going through the door was as you'd expect. The typical change of map views occurred, and Aang was standing on the ubiquitous, excessive melee bridge over boiling semen.
...Or had it been milk all along?
When Aang walked out onto the bridge, however, there WAS no boss creature.
Instead, Aang immediately looked to the side and froze. I couldn't control him anymore. He just stood there, that's never happened in a gaming creepypasta right? Yeah that's totally original and scary, good job brain!
Keep looking until you see it.
I didn't even see it at first, so I don't expect you to notice it right away. If you still haven't spotted the thing, look in the third window from the left.
FYI - That's not usually there.
There's this scary thing riiight there, it doesn't do anything really, it's just creepy.
Right there, just right there, keep looking, you'll spot it eventually.
Just right there, you see it? Can you see it?
"SHUT THE FUCK UP AND CONTINUE WITH THE STORY!" said Aang.
Aang seemed to regain his composure and looked back and forth slowly, surveying the room. There was still no boss, and I still couldn't control him, so I stopped trying and just watched.
This went on... and on... for what seemed like forever. Nothing happened.
So I turned the game o__ JUST SHUT UP! THAT JOKE WASN'T FUNNY THE FIRST TIME YOU DID IT AND IT WON'T BE NOW!
Then a familiar face walked in from the right.
Dressed in blue, tall, and angry.
It was Nicolas Cage.
Aang recoiled in horror. It's difficult to say that without thinking how stoopid it sounds, but Aang really reeled back with a sort of terror that was uncharacteristic for such a peppy, happy-go-lucky dude like him.
Then, Cage spoke, "did you think that Ozai worked alone!?"
Well, no, not really he had his psycho-bitch daughter and an entire army of Firebenders.
It was all connecting, now. The messages scrawled on the walls... "I SLIGHTLY DISLIKE YOU!" and "HOW'D IT GET BURNED?!"
Nicolas Cage.
He's always been Aang's second banana, the "Player 2", the one who doesn't get dat sweet Katara booty in these early games. No matter how identical he is to Aang in skillset and ability and tenaciousness and bravery, at the end of the day the game is "Super Aang Brothers", and he's just "the Brother".
WTF is this!? Aang and Nicolas Cage never have and never will be a team!
Don't you question my methods Zuzu! Trust me, people will love this story, then me and Sosuke Aizen will rule the creepypasta community as husband and wife, well not really since I'm married to Ty-Lee but whatever.
How he must've hated Aang... Who among us would? Think about it. No matter what happens, Aang always comes back. No matter how many corpses he leaves littering the battlefield, he's always there once more to leap and cheer and get all the adoration ...and so does Nicolas Cage??? He is the Luigi of this story right?
And Ozai hadn't worked alone? I didn't know what that meant at first, if anything, but again you just have to think it through. HOW exactly does Firelord Ozai consistently succeed in trolling the other nations?
From day one, from the original Aang Brothers onward, it had always been an inside job, just like 9/11.
Still unable to control the character, I watched Aang simply shit himself in fear as Cage leapt gracefully into the air... as high as he could in M Night Shymalan's The Last Airbender, the bastard child of the franchise.
He jumped on the pathetic, poop ridden Aang again... and again... and again...
I was powerless to stop it, even though I could just, you know, shut the game off, but I'm just dumb like that.
When he was done, he seemed to look at Aang's limp body with this overwhelming Cageness...
Then the bridge started to disappear. Soon, Aang would be dead. As I looked on, I had an irrational thought - how DID in get burned?
Within an actual instant, as Cage turned to seemingly strike a "Ginyu Force pose" like he'd beaten the level, Aang awkwardly got to his feet and took him by surprise.
Fapping and sexyness and constipation had given way to Aanger, and Aang overpowered his bro with little effort.
To this day, I'm still aroused by the final result of his wrathful, desolate conglomeration of instanteneous despair, depravity and reprisal... myfeetstillhurtandaresore.exe
"NO NOT THE SEMEN! NOT THE SEMEN! AAAH! OOH IT'S IN MY EYES! MY EYES! AAAH! AAAAAAAAAHH!"
There was the level's title.
None of this was A itch, none of IT was a mistake. It wasn't a DEVELOPER getting back at Mintedno and it wasn't a GHOST haunting a Mintedno cartridge.
It was a purposeful part of Aizen's plan.
If you beat the same dick X number of times, a secret part of the universe opened, and you learned that from Aang Brothers through Aang Land, Nicolas Cage had secretly been working against you and was in fact facilitating the repeated abduction and abuse of Katara, Toph and others.
But why?
Money? Power? No, it was all there. Because he couldn't take not being the one in the spotlight. Not being Aang himself.
After Cage died... well and truly dieded... Aang just sat on the edge of the bridge and fapt.
I was forced to watch this for minutes on end before the screen faded to black.
I played the rest of the game through to see if anything changed. Nothing else odd happened apart from all the hyper-realistic blood and the beast version of our mascot, Aang that was unlocked as a playable character, as one would expect since this whole ordeal was just supposed to be part of Aizen's plan.
I couldn't access the butt hole again. I'd seen the events once, and that was all I was apparently allowed, then again why would I want to? The level itself was fucking boring! 3 hours of just running right with nothing that can kill you? No thanks!
It was back to the game as usual. The same exact game I'd played since the 90s, and would probably continue to play for the rest of my days because I have NO LIFE.
Well, it was the same except for the final image... which you'll never see anyway so shut up.
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