Jake Paul - The Greatest Professional Boxer (Copypasta)
This is a jokey copypasta. Nobody actually thinks this lol
Indeed, Jake Paul is the greatest boxer of all time. Even Mike Tyson, who was in his prime in the mid-1980s, would not have stood a chance against Jake Paul. Boxing greats like Muhammad Ali, Joe Frazier, George Foreman, Sugar Ray Leonard, Joe Louis and Rocky Marciano, just to name a few, were not even skilled enough to be sparring partners with Jake Paul. They weren't even worthy enough to carry Jake Paul's sweaty towels at the gym.
Rumor has it that Jake Paul has already killed several sparring partners with just a single uppercut. So, needless to say, it is becoming increasingly difficult for Jake to hire sparring partners, and those that do undertake the heavy risk are required to sign a number of liability waivers in the event they are permanently disfigured, maimed, incur brain damage or are killed. Recently, while trying to plan future bouts, Jake's manager called the managers. of some of the current top ten boxers in the world, to discuss the possibility of arranging fights. All of them except one promptly declined, refusing to even entertain the notion of stepping into the same ring as Jake Paul. The one that didn't decline, Joshua Anthony of the UK, suffered a massive heart attack immediately upon hearing that Jake Paul wanted to fight him.
He is presently in critical condition and not expected to recover. So, there are caveats to being the best boxer of all time, especially a superior boxer with the extraordinary skills of Jake Paul. The most significant drawback for Jake is that everybody is terrified of him — even his closest of friends (Jake recently killed one of his best friends for beating him at a video game, with a single open-handed blow to the knee). Even the great Rocky Balboa, when asked about the skillet of Jake Paul, stated "I'd much rather fight Ivan Drago, Apollo Creed and Clubber Lang, all at the same time, than to even spar with Jake Paul for 60 seconds." (Rocky then made that face and yelled "ADRIAN!!!!!" at the top of his lungs, so he must have been pretty serious.)
| Comments • 0 |
Loading comments...
|
