Manners

Now listen here buddy. I don't know what they do where you're from, but in this town, we punch ourselves in the balls before we sit down to eat. Okay? So if you're gonna come up to a restaurant in this town, and wanna be served, and eat the good food that we all eat? I'll tell you this is some of the best food you're ever gonna have in your life. You wanna sit and be served like a gentleman in this town? You make sure you punch yourself in the fucking balls before you go ahead and eat this food, and you make a damn show of it. You make sure everybody sees it. Okay? You do it hard enough so that you yell. Cause if you don't then we don't like to serve people like that here. Okay? Listen, it's not our responsibility to dictate what goes on in the rest of the world, but so long as you're in our town, so long as you're gonna be staying here, so long as you're gonna be walking into our businesses and asking to be served just like anybody else? You make sure you go ahead and punch yourself in the fucking balls before you take that first bite, or else that's gonna be seen as a sign of deep disrespect. Okay? It's akin to saying grace here. You gotta punch yourself in the balls before you sit down to eat. Don't matter if you're a woman or a man. If you're a woman you punch yourself in the goddamn cooch! Okay? You do it real hard. You do some damage to that cooch. I'll tell you what, every single person in this town has a damaged package. Because of their commitment to doing things right. Their commitment to being polite. To doing the right thing. Okay? Not a single one of the men in this town can get an erection anymore. And not a single one of the women in this town, has been able to to carry children, because they punch themselves in the fucking privates before they sit down to eat. That's the way it's supposed to be. Okay? So if wanna eat in this town, and I'm telling you again, I saw you take that first bite and I saw how much you enjoyed it! You know that the food in this town is really really good! It's high class food! But if you're gonna eat our food, and be a guest in our town? You better go ahead and make sure you start punching yourself in the balls before you sit down to eat, even when you are alone. Even in your hotel room. Okay? Cause, cause, cause, cause cause, cause the fact, the idea that someone's not punching themselves in the fucking balls before they eat? Are you kidding me? I fucking pissed blood since I was five years old. Okay? I've been pissing fucking blood since I was five years old, cause I do what's right. So you go ahead and punch yourself in the fucking balls. Okay?

Comments • 0

Loading comments...