Mario Kart 8: Deadly Roads
The Beginning - September 4th, 2017
I was at therapy with LillyCutiePlayz, Mati, LDA, and our therapist. We were outside, walking around. Nothing much. Then we went to Dairy Queen, returned to the building, ing and decided we play Mario Kart because we were bored and had nothing else to do Me and LillyCutiePlayz accepted, then we started playing the game.
The Game
A black screen faded in with white text saying:
''Welcome to our society.."
This better not be a horror game we accidentally got, Matilda said in a serious tone.
"I'm done with this society already. Everyone must die." I said in a demonic voice.
"OMG! SABRINA'S VOICE IS DISTORTED!!!" Lilly and Matilda said in a shocked tone.
I didn't mean the everyone must die part, ok?
''Now we can play..."
Play what? Everyone asked.
"AND DRIVE ON DEADLY ROADS!"
"OMG! DEADLY ROADS?! WE NEED TO REMOVE THE CARTRIDGE RIGHT NOW!" LillyCutiePlayz said.
Our therapist tried to remove the cartridge, but it was unsuccessful. The cartridge even sparked a little bit. Everyone gasped and started backing away.
We started with Sweet Sweet Canyon, but all the candy was replaced with eyeballs, human organs, and intestines. The first race started and 2 racers already died. There was a gravestone in front of the racer's names, meaning that they died. However, on the final lap, the road went up into the air, killing the remaining players.
I just exited the game and people started thanking me and even called me a hero! How superior! But, a few minutes later, I accidentally returned to the game and a picture of Sonic with red pupils started flashing on the screen.
Someone said that the image and game was too much, so it's best we unplug the Wii. I politely agree and unplug it, but the screen didn't turn off for some reason. Nobody could escape this madness. We were frightened and we didn't know what else to do, so my therapist called the police to investigate the matter.
"What kind of sick person would do this?" One of the officers said.
"I don't know who did it." My therapist said.
The police were investigating the matter while we were outside the room (because the police told us to leave until they were done) and we were shaken up, feeling paralyzed, and traumatized to death. We discovered that Warren Jones made the game and it was a pirated copy. I don't know how piracy wasn't detected in the first place.
The Aftermath
Warren got arrested for piracy for 10 years, and ever since he got arrested, everyone lost interest in Mario Kart 8 and the Nintendo Wii indefinitely. We threw away all Mari related games to prevent anyone else experiencing the same trauma me and my therapy buddies went through. Nowadays, we play in the ball bit and even take rids in the therapist's car most of the time.
The most unbelievable thing was that Warren Jones, the guy who got arrested, made multiple copies of the pirated Mario Kart 8 cartridge and distributed thousands of them, thus giving children nightmares and driving them to commit suicide.
It was unfortunate to find out that suicide reports went through the roof during that time.
Congratulations on finishing this pasta. You're free to go...
Credited to SabrinaPizzaLibra
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