My new suit

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  NSFW WARNING

This page is not safe for work or school. The content of this story is not suitable for some audiences, and may be inappropriate to view in some situations.
...Or in all situations, at any time, any place, and by any audience for that matter.

I was wearing a very fine suit. It was black, with undershirt sticking out, and very magnificent folds that magnificently flapped out in the majestic breeze.

Today, I had a job interview, so I wore my very fine suit. I was in a hurry, so I couldn't even spend a moment of my life eating mega cheerios.

When I walked outside, everyone ran away from me. I was hurt. I was very hurt. Big crybaby tears bubbled out of my hyper-realistic eyes and I broke down. Then I got mad. I told them to go away. "Go away," I said. "Or I will call LOLSKELETONS for unofficial harassment of an innocent man."

So I kept strolling down the streets with people running away from me. I was now confused. Why were people scared of me? I shook my head and kept walking.

When I finally reached my interview place, the interviewer looked horrified. He screamed. He died. His secretary quickly yanked out a phone and called 911.

"What did I do?" I mused to myself.

Suddenly the police barged in. "Hands up sir" they say. "You are arrested for-"

"For what?" I said loudly.

Then I looked down.

What the fuck! In my haste, I had forgot to put on my pants. My long penis dangled out of my groin, and I could only just stare at it. I had a beautiful penis.

I just admire my penis.

I think you do too.

You're next.

(For the penis anyway)

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