Real Men Don't Wipe Their Ass

If you're a grown-ass man and you still wipe your ass, you're not a real man.

This should be self-explanatory but apparently, I have to justify myself.

There's nothing more feminine than using a product on your body. Makeup is 100% feminine and by the same logic, so is wiping your ass. I haven't wiped my ass in about 4 years, and I've NEVER had any issues. My digestive system is in the top 1% in terms of regularity, functionality, and performance, and I've never once felt the need to "clean up" after myself.

If you shit, and you need to wipe, you've got an emasculated GI tract and that's your own issue. Man up and get your shit (literally) together.

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