Scared? I HOPE U R.....

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...Or in all situations, at any time, any place, and by any audience for that matter.

I never believed in murderers, but then I took an arrow in the knee. Oh, the story? Oh yeah, here's the fucking story:


I was playing Amnesia because I'm so kewl like that and I hate retro games. I am a motherfucking hipster, man. So yeah I was playing Amnesia like the god of hipsters, PewDiePie. After I played Amnesia I watched PewDiePie play it. Cause, who the fuck wants to play a game without watching PewDiePie play it? But then, I heard a noise..... coming from my vibrator. I forgot, I left it in my butthole. But then I heard an even SCARIER NOISE OMFG LOL. But there was no LOL in this noise. It sounded like the noises I hear when playing Amnesia or Slenderman, oh boy I'm living my favorite games of all time! But you can die in those games....Oh shiet...


I went to Sweden to meet PewDiePie to see if the noise was a game glitch. Cause you know, PewDiePie knows all about games, he owns every game known to man. So after PewDie fucked me I came in my pants. Then I went home and I saw Slender. Yeah, from Slenderman! I asked him to have homosexual oral sex with me and he said yes. So I sucked his penis and balls and in favor, he sucked mine. After that we had anal sex. A year later (Present day), We are married and have 4 adopted french children. The kids are lucky to have 3 dads, Slendy, PewDie and me. Me, Slendy and PewDie have threesomes every day. PewDie cums in my mouth and I love it.

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