Shrek's Day of Shrekoning

Now this is a story all about an ogre named Shrek and I'd like to take a minute, so just sit right there - I'll tell you how his life got flipped upside-down.

In a swamp Shrek was born and raised, on an overgrown playground was where he spent most of his days, hanging out with his friends and trying to look cool while playing basketball outside of school. When a couple of guys who were government men started dumping radioactive waste in his swamp, he got horribly mutated into a creature people began to call an "ogre". His people were eventually wiped out in a top secret government purge that nobody knew about and he was alone in the swamps away from a society that he knew would reject him. Over the years, Shrek went insane and started speaking with an Irish accent. One day a weird loser traveler in the swamps met Shrek and later made a movie about him.

Years later, Shrek became an internet meme and some dumbass even went into the swamp to see if Shrek was real. He got his wallet stolen by the woman from the Popeye's commercials who killed him and stole his laptop too, who was later killed by Shrek, who stole the laptop and used it to go on the interwebs where he found out that he was an internet meme.

Shrek later bought a suit and went into civilization and sued the creator of the movie. He won millions of dollars and became a famous rich person in the city, but the good times didn't last forever, as Shrek became addicted to cocaine and later almost died of drug ogredose. He decided to turn his life back around and moved back to the swamps to be one with nature until he died a slow death of type 4 diabetes like some hippie shit like that.

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