Sonic.exe the Turkey Hog vs Blackbuster
Previously on Silver the Turkey Hog: Silver the Turkey Hog
Silver the hedgehog has been possessed by the terrifying Thankskilling Turkey who morphed his ass into his victim's already turkey-ass shaped forehead, not only giving him a special "Head Cannon", but also gained the Turkey's hunger for vengeance on Kingmasterreview, the Iblis Trigger for... Uh... Whatever he did to Silver those years ago... And also for stealing the only surviving copy of Silver the Turkey Hog 2, in Dimension X where Silver the Turkey Hog battled the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, thinking they were the Iblis Triggers. So technically, this is Silver the Turkey Hog 3! By the way, there's supposed to be "BOOBS" in the first second!
—
Exactly five years later at 5:55 and five point five hundred fifty five seconds P.M. May 2014 as the prophecy is foretold; Sonic and Shadow are driving in their Limousine, drinking champagne and gossiping about how much of a dumbass Silver was.
Sonic; "You know, I kind of feel bad about Silver for how dumb he is!"
Shadow; "Really? I think he's too stupid to have Hert Fellings..."
Suddenly, the roof of the Limo rips open and Silver the Turkey Hog crashes in.
Turkey; "Gobble, Gobble, MOTHER-!"
Silver; "WHERE'S THE IBLIS TRIGGER!?!?!?!?!?"
Sonic; "HOLY CRAP! THERE'S A VULTURE'S ASS STICKING OUT OF YO HEAD!!!"
Shadow; "WOAH! It even has a hole!"
Turkey; "HEY! You interrupted my catchphrase! It's Gobble, Gobble, MOTHER-!"
Sonic; "Holy Crap! That vulture's ASS talks!"
Turkey twists Silver's head around to grab Sonic by his chest hairs in his talons sticking from the back of Silver's head.
Turkey; "SHUT UP! I'll do the Talking here, FA-!"
Shadow; "The legend IS true, I knew that evil Turkey existed!"
Turkey; "... Let's just get to the basics! Someone by the name of Kingmasterreview has stolen our video copy of Silver the Turkey Hog 2 and my host here thinks he's some kind of trigger for armageddon, or whatever the Hell it is! WHERE IS HE!?"
Sonic and Shadow had no clue what Turkey was talking about and simply shrug their shoulders.
Turkey; "OK, then feel the wrath of my FOREHEAD TURKEY ASS CANNON!!!"
Turkey loads up his ammunition inside Silver's forehead and open fire like a chain gun... IT'S SUPER INEFFECTIVE!
Silver; "IT'S NO USE!"
Turkey; "SHUT THE -(Sonic and Shadow, covered in bird droppings, interrupt by throwing up in disgust)- UP! As for you two, I'm going to drink you're blood like Cranberry Sauce, MEANIES!!!!!"
Silver the Turkey Hog flaps his tiny bird wings sticking out of his ears and flies off.
Sonic; "Uh... What the Hell just happened?"
Shadow; "I'm the only one who should say "Damn you to Hell" around here!"
—
Doing his "Superman thing", Silver the Turkey Hog flies backwards at over Mach 9, zooming past Goku and Vegeta, as he Cool-Aid-Man style burst into Blackbustercritic's room (OH YEAH!!!) in the middle of having yet another Skype war against a mysterious console fanboy.
Turkey; "BLACKBUSTER!!! You have some information I need to know. WHERE IS KING-!?!?!?"
Blackbuster; "Excuse me! I'm in the middle of a Skype conversation! Wait you're turn!"
Turkey; "SHUT UP! I WANT ANSWERES NOW-"
In less than one tenth of a second, Blackbuster flips out Gaston's blunderbuss, aiming it dead center at Turkey's face with furious, black and red, bloody, hyper-realistic glaring eyes.
Turkey; "(gulp) ok, i'll wait."
(An hour later)
Blackbuster; "So, Turkey, I'm guessing you're here to take revenge on Kingmasterreview! Well, I just talked to him."
Turkey; "he was right there!? well (still nervously staring down the barrel of Gaston's blunderbuss), did he say anything about the Silver the Hedgehog 2 copy?"
Blackbuster; "No, he only tried and failed to back up his statement on console games being superior to the PC. These people just can't take a hint that they are wasting so much money! However, I'd suggest you let you're grudge on him go, he's not worth you're time."
Turkey; "well, ok, i'll leave him be. anyway, how do you know me?"
Blackbuster; "Did you by any chance see my video "ALWAYS WATCHING... ALWAYS"? I said "When I'm away... I'M STILL WATCHING! I see every fucking thing you people do!" Even that moron, Rollertroller, who wrote that atrocious story about you in the first place!"
(A worm-plot-hole rips through the fabrics of Space and Time)
Turkey; "Ok, Ok, thanks for the info, later (How was he able to swear when I can't!?)!"
(After leaving the house)
Silver; "So, we're not going to stop the Iblis Trig-?"
Turky; "HAH! SUCKER! Thinking he can control us from our destiny! Let's go!"
(Takes flight)
Silver; "Yippee!"
The two fly off as the worm-plot-hole devours Blacbustercritic, his cat and his house, but don't worry, they're ok... They'll be BACK!
—
Silver the Turkey Hog, still scouring high and low, eventually arrives near Kingmasterreview's house.
Turkey; "Now, Kingmasterreview, you will be the one to get STUFFED!"
But then, from out of nowhere, the entire atmosphere turns into a dark red!
Silver; "Don't tell me the Iblis Trigger just activated!"
Then, the Kefka laugh erupted from nowhere as a familiar black/red bleeding eyed, shark toothed, blue furry figure emerged.
Turkey; "Nah, it's just that loser has-been Sonic.exe!"
Sonic.exe; "I AM GOD!"
Turkey; "No you're not, you're even stupider than Silver! Now what gives?"
Sonic.exe; "Want to play with me!?"
Turkey; "I've got a better idea, how about I switch bodies?..."
Suddenly, Turkey separates himself from Silver and lunges for Sonic.exe, completely catching him off guard as Turkey merges his ass with Sonic.exe's forehead.
Sonic.exe; "WHAT THE HELL'S HAPPENING TO ME!?!?!?"
Tail feathers replace Sonic.exe's quills, his ears turned into wings, the quills on his back turn into feet, Turkey's head sprouts out from the back of the head and a hole appears between Sonic.exe's eyes. Sonic.exe has didgivolved into... SONIC.EXE THE TURKEY HOG!!!!!!!!!
Silver, still retaining turkey feathers on his forehead, suddenly discovered the horrifying truth...
Silver; "It's YOU! Sonic! You are the Iblis Trigger ALL ALONG!!!"
Turkey; "NO, you F-(Sonic.exe interrupts with his Kefka laugh) DUMBASS! I AM the Iblis Trigger! And I am going to avenge my fellow Indians for the racist cruelty of the White Man (yes, the Turkey said "Indians" in the direct to DVD films, he's a hypocrite)! And since you're the whitest one about, I'll start my Thankskilling with YOU!"
Turkey controls Sonic.exe to aim his Forehead Turkey Ass Cannon at Silver, but then, a miracle arrives...
—
Sonic, Shadow and (gasp!) Blackbustercritic and his cat, come to the rescue!
Sonic; "Well, well, well! It seemed like the once undisputed King of the video game Creepypastas fallen from grace into a Trollpasta just got more pathetic!"
Shadow; "Let me guess, you have an ASS cannon on you're forehead as well!"
Blackbuster; "Technically, I'm not with these two stupid rodents! But we all agree, you are the dumbest fucking "pasta" we have seen so far!"
Turkey; "HAH! You're too late, F-(Sonic.exe interrupts with his Kefka laugh (Seriously, how is Blackbuster able to swear when I can't)! Now that I have merged with Sonic.exe, I shall rule all Pastas, Copypastas, Creepypastas, Trollpastas and all other fan-fiction across the web!"
Sonic.exe; "We will have so many friends to torture!"
Blackbuster; "... That's just dumb!"
Sonic, Shadow and Silver, together gain the power of the chaos emeralds to once again rip-off Dragon Ball Z... Only for Sonic.exe the Turkey Hog to swat them silly like flies.
Sonic.exe; "Now! Blackbuster, it's just you and us-"
Turkey; (Kicks Sonic.exe in the face) "ME! It's just him and me, I'm the one in control here, FA-(Kefka laugh again)!"
Blackbuster; "Just get this over with!"
—
Let the battle commence! Turkey Sonic.exe dose his Metal Sonic flying sprite pose and charges, but Blackbuster stands ready and roundhouse kicks him in the nards! Then Blackbuster launches from the ground and football tackles Turkey Sonic.exe, the both of them rocketing into outer space! The two land on the volcano infested Venus with the impact of a 100km wide asteroid strike as they prepare their projectile weapons! Turkey Sonic.exe lock and loads his FOREHEAD TURKEY ASS CANNON and opens fire, but the bird droppings simply vaporize in the intense heat!
Silver; "IT'S NO USE!!!"
Blackbuster flips out Gaston's blunderbuss and fires 1,000 rounds per second with the accuracy of a ninja sniper! IT'S SUPER EFFECTIVE!!! Turkey Sonic.exe is critically wounded, but Turkey controls Sonic.exe to preform their trump card... To turn Venus into Hell with black sky and BLACK AND RED HYPER-REALISTIC BLOOD! However, the change in atmosphere has no effect on Blackbuster.
Blackbuster; "Seriously, those Creepypasta words are so damn old!"
Turkey; "How could this be!? How powerful are you!? And why are you able to SWEAR!?!?!?"
Blackbuster; "You get away with saying "ass"!"
Turkey; "oh..."
Blackbuster now pulls out his own trump card as he charges towards Sonic.exe the Turkey Hog.
Blackbuster; "CONSCIDER THIS MY LAST SONIC BRAINFART, BITCH!!!"
Blackbuster slams into Turkey Sonic.exe with an enraged superheated head-butt. A gigantic explosion engulfs Venus in blinding light! After the dust settles, Sonic.exe is nowhere to be found and all that renames of Turkey is deep fry.
Blackbuster; "Now, if you excuse me, I gotta take care of my cat and get back to work!"
He and his cat return home.
Back on Earth, Silver the Turkey Hog wakes up... only to confront Kingmasterreview, holding the sole surviving video copy of Silver the Turkey Hog 2 between his teeth and staring with BLACK AND RED HYPER-REALISTIC BLOOD eyes looking RIGHT AT HIM!!!!!!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sonic, Shadow, Silver; copyright Sonic Team SEGA
Turkey; copyright Thankskilling films
Gaston's blunderbuss; copyright Disney Beauty and the Beast
Kingmasterreview; YouTube
Blackbustercritic; Blackbustershow TouTube
Sonic.exe; uh... Tom?
YouTube reading
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