Sonic Scarypasta

One day I was all like "I'm going to play some sonic". Instead of using an emulator, I decided to go on eBay, and find a possibly non-working dusty cartridge. I found one for $49.99. Now, hold on a sec... that's probably the best deal I've ever seen, so needless to say I bought it. It came in the mail about a minute later, and I opened the box. A spider crawled out. Ah. I took out the cartridge, and the cover didn't look at all like Sonic, it looked like a cartridge with... no sticker. That's really odd, man.

After blowing and cleaning the shit out of the cartridge, because emulators are for emuLAMERS, yeah that's right, I popped it into my old genesis which too needed cleaning. Now, woah, I did some weird button combination, and a ring sound happened, then I pressed start, and Sonic was a RING! Then, then a item box, then an enemy! Right there, I knew this was a cursed cartridge. Then it started raining and thundering outside so loud it turned off all the power in the house, except for the Genesis. Why did happen? Because shut up. Anyway, I continued playing, when I got to the first boss, I was a motobug. Eggman attacking his own robots? What the shit.

After that, I shut the game off, ran outside, and then a ladybug flew onto my arm. I was like, "I'll put you out of your misery, Sonic..." SMAAAAAAAAASH!! I smashed Sonic. Then, the curse was gone, and the power turned back on, I quickly smashed the cartridge with a sludge hammer, and for good measure, the TV as well.

Still the best 50 bucks I spent in a while.

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