SpongeBob Lost Episode: Death to Bikini Bottom
I have always been a HUGE SpongeBob fan. I've loved the show for almost my entire life. Until one fateful day...
So I was at a DVD/VHS store where they had all sorts of tapes and DVDs, and I was looking for SpongeBob. I found some DVDs of it, but I already had them all. I then saw some tapes of it. I already had all of them too, except for one.
There was one VHS of it that I had never seen before. It looked worn out, and there was no title. It just said "SpongeBob" in Sharpie. It was very poorly written. I decided to buy it. When I bought it, the cashier said, "Go ahead and buy it, but don't say I didn't warn you." I thought that was a bit creepy at first, but I just shrugged it off and thanked him and walked out.
When I got home, I got some soda and popcorn, and sat down on the couch. My parents were out of town, and my little sister was at my grandparents' house spending the night. Luckily we have a VHS player, and I popped the tape in.
When the episode started, it was normal. The painting of the pirate said "Are you ready kids?" and the kids said "Aye aye, captain!" but the kids were screaming as they said it. The pirate than said, "I can't hear you!" and the kids said "Aye aye, captain!" again, but they were still screaming. The theme song then plays, but SpongeBob isn't there, and whenever the kids normally say "SpongeBob SquarePants!" it's replaced with them screaming. I was starting to get creeped out. There was a title card, but it was glitchy, and it was just gibberish letters. The music was distorted, reversed title card music. The bubble transition appears, and the episode starts out normal.
It shows SpongeBob coming out of his pineapple house to go to work. Patrick sees him and says "Can I come too?" SpongeBob then says "Sure, Pat!" and they walk to the Krusty Krab.
They walk into the kitchen. SpongeBob starts making Krabby Patties. He picks one up and says, "This one's for you, Patrick. The first patty of the day." Patrick thanks him and eats the Krabby Patty. Patrick then finds a knife in the kitchen and says, "Hey! What's this?" SpongeBob says, "That's a knife, Pat. You shouldn't be playing with that. You could hurt yourself." Patrick then says, "Wow! I gotta go play with this new toy I found!" He then runs out of the kitchen into the dining room with the knife in his hand.
He goes up to a customer eating a Krabby Patty. He says, "Hi customer! Wanna play with my new toy?" The customer then shouts "Yeah sure, why not?" and Patrick accidentally stabs him. He collapses to the ground dead. Patrick says, "Oh no! What have I DONE??!!?!" He then looks at the corpse and says, "Hey, that was kinda fun! I gotta do that again!" He then stabs every customer in the restaurant, and skips home happily.
The next scene shows Squidward in his house playing his clarinet. Patrick knocks on his door, and Squidward walks downstairs to get the door. He sees Patrick and then, annoyed and sarcastically, he says "Oh, it's you Patrick, what a nice surprise!" There is a second of static, and then it shows Squidward's corpse on the ground. He had the knife in his chest. Patrick then looks at the screen with bloodshot eyes. There is another burst of static, and then it shows Patrick at Sandy's treedome. The animation was lazy. It shows Patrick busting a hole into the door to get in. He sees Sandy doing an experiment. Patrick then gets a big brown sack and stuffs her in it. He kidnaps her and takes her to his house.
He puts her on a cot and says, "Sweet dreams." He then decapitates her and then stabs her in the chest. He rips out her insides and starts eating them. Another burst of static.
It then shows Patrick at Goo Lagoon. Everyone there is playing in the sun and enjoying themselves. He takes out the knife from his back pocket and starts stabbing everyone there. He now has red eyes. There are some glitches, but I could make out the corpses of Larry the Lobster, Mrs. Puff, Flatts the Flounder, Mr. Krabs, Pearl, Plankton, Karen, and many other background characters. I had no idea what would happen next.
It then shows SpongeBob at his house watching Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy. Then a news report comes on the TV and says "We interrupt this broadcast to give you some breaking news. There is a lunatic starfish on the loose, and he has a knife. He has already killed half of Bikini Bottom's residents. We recommend you stay inside your houses and barricade the doors and windows. I'm Perch Perkins, and I am about to be killed by this crazy starfi-" Patrick then runs onto the TV screen and kills the news reporter. The news report turns into static. SpongeBob then yells "PATRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" He is then whacked on the head with a sledgehammer. It knocks him out.
There is a black screen for about 30 seconds. It then shows SpongeBob waking up in a dark closet. There is a whisper from behind him saying "You're next, Sponge." I knew it was Patrick, but it sounded nothing like him. SpongeBob screams, and the screen turns into static and glitches. There are gibberish letters and numbers everywhere. I could faintly make out Patrick stabbing SpongeBob to death. There are some distorted screams, and then some reversed whispers. Afterwards, it shows Patrick walking through Bikini Bottom with the knife. He is bloody and looks depressed. His insides are coming out of his body. He gets weaker and weaker, and then collapses. The episode ends. There are no credits. On the screen it shows the numbers "22022202222428222021120222722333828222213001220000" I had no idea what the numbers stood for, but I then realized they were phone numbers. I called the numbers but all I could hears was breathing. Except for the last number.
When I called the last number, I heard breathing, but it was louder. Through the breathing I could faintly hear, "Burn in the hands of Satan." I was scared as crap. I call this episode "Death to Bikini Bottom" because of how Patrick killed everyone in Bikini Bottom.
I smashed the VHS into pieces and tried to forget about it, but I just couldn't erase the image of SpongeBob being stabbed to death out of my mind. If you ever come across this episode, DO. NOT. WATCH. IT. Take my word for it. I will never watch SpongeBob again. Wait you know what, screw it. I'll just never watch Nickelodeon again. I will never unsee this episode. This episode made me paranoid. I have nightmares about Patrick every night. I can't live like this. Just somebody put me out of my misery. Please...
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Originally on Geoshea's Lost Episodes Wiki
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