Spongebob Squarepants: Melancholia
Before the production of the first Spongebob episode, Stephen and some of the cast members were acting very strange. There was a guy that was constantly submitting morbid ideas for Episodes, such as Spongebob killing himself. But one of his most vile, disgusting, and horrid ideas was an episode titled "Melancholia"
Unlike most of his other ideas, Melancholia was actually supposed to be the pilot of the series. And the series was originally gonna be about Squidward instead of Spongebob. One day, an person (name unknown) sent a VHS tape to Nickelodeon headquarters. It was the 30th of April, 1999 and many people were hyped about the debut of a brand new series. The sticker on the VHS tape was written in Sharpie Marker. It had the words:
"Spongebob Pilot"
along with the released date of the episode. Which would've been "May 1, 1999"
Many people thought that this was nothing more than a Bootleg tape, so a few people expected this to be a pre production version of the episode "Help Wanted" The one where Spongebob gets a job at the Krusty Krab. Some people even thought that this would be an 1 long special, dedicated to the making of the show.
The tape looked really beat up, as if a vehicle had ran over it. And the film strip wasn't any better, it looked torn and even had some stains near the very bottom of the strip. Many of the staff members thought that the tape had already been viewed. A staff member looked at the very bottom of the tape and saw a tiny sheet of paper. He took the paper off the tape and it said:
"This tape has never been used before. It was made by a guy, the same guy who submitted the ideas to the studio. Yes, i know that it looks damaged, but that's just how the tape looks like"
Without hesitation, Stephen Hillenburg put the tape into the VCR and the test audience began to watch.
It started off with the normal intro we all know and love. But at the very end of the intro, instead of Spongebob playing his nose like a flute, Squidward appeared and started to cry. The crying was still very cartoony, but it still confused the audience.
The title of the episode was "Melancholia" It was plain black text on a white background, not to mention that it wasn't the font normally used for Spongebob title cards. It was in Comic Sans. The happy-go-lucky music played as normal.
The episode started off at Spongebob's house, he was getting ready to go to the Krusty krab. The odd thing is, that the animation was very smooth and the backgrounds were colourless. So far, the episode looked unfinished. It was like a test animation, minus the running and jumping. Anyway, Spongebob was writing down a list of chores for him to do. His voice didn't really sound like Tom Kenny at all, it sounded much deeper and less upbeat.
Spongebob then left his house, chanting the same "I'm ready" chant that would be later be used in "Help Wanted" Only this time, it sounded a lot more downbeat. Some people thought that the guy behind the episode was voicing all of the characters. The moment he walked into the Krusty krab, spongebob screamed:
"I'M NOT READY!"
A poorly drawn picture of a Krab (Presumably a prototype for Mister krabs) Walked out of a door and said:
"What the hell are you doing here? Do you want a shitty ass job?"
This caught the audience off guard. Nobody has sworn in a Kids show before! Although it did show some of the characters swearing in a much, much later episode (Sailor Mouth) but it was bleeped and you couldn't hear what Spongebob or Patrick said.
Spongebob started to talk to Mister Krabs:
"I need money"
"No you don't, me boy. What can i help you with?"
"I. Need. Money"
Spongebob started to chant that phrase over and over again. This lasted for about 2 minutes, and Mister Krabs' face started to melt.
"Sorry, Sponge. But you have to work to earn money!"
"I. want. Money!"
"Sponge, if you want money so bad then why don't you apply for a job? You can get a job right here at the Krusty Krab!"
The screen zoomed into Spongebob's disheveled face. Tears started to fall from his eyes as he slowly walked out of the Krusty Krab. On the way back to his house, Squidward came up to him and started to tease him. He called him various mean names such as "The walking Cheese" and "Night of the living talking Sponge" This started to annoy spongebob a lot! The screen zoomed into his face, and his eyes got angrier and angrier. Eventually, his whole body started to shake in anger.
"Are you angry now?! HA! that's what you get for being an annoying piece of shit!" Squidward exclaimed cheerfully.
Spongebob then got a knife and impaled it through Squidward's body. He twisted the knife through his stomach as some animated blood started to drip from his wound. Squidward was screaming quite loudly and Spongebob was laughing demonically. Squidward then dropped to the ground, dead. And spongebob walked back to his house, still feeling very depressed.
Back at his house, Spongebob was watching TV with a sad expression on his face. He was continuously flipping channels, as if he had nothing to watch on TV.
The screen started to zoom in on his face once more, and his eyes were extremely small this time. There was a beard underneath his nose, but it wasn't like your usual beard you see usually see on some men. No, it wasn't like that at all. Instead, it was very faint and you could see spongebob's mouth getting progressively larger and larger.
The screen zoomed out of Spongebob's face. On the TV, you could hear the sounds of people getting murdered and animals getting slaughtered for food. Spongebob then opened his mouth, revealing 2 layers of sharp teeth. Along with some ants and worms coming out of his mouth. His body started to rise into the air and spin, his body spun for about 4 minutes. While this was happening, you could see images of burnt down houses, bomb test victims, and people mutilated by landmines flashing rapidly across the screen.
The body of Spongebob fell to the floor, and the TV shut off by itself. Ending the episode completely.
Credited to DankLordX
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