Sponges Don't Wear Ties!
Once upon a time, in a galaxy far far away...
DADANANA-DA-DA-DA-DA-DA-DA-DA-DA-DA-DA-DA DA-NA-NA-NA-NA-NA-DA-NA-NA-NA-NA-DA-DA-NA-NA-NA!!!!!111!
So, like, I was an intern at Nick Jr, or some cripe, and the a skeleton popped out, and was like, 'Go be an intern an Nickelodeon, not Nick Jr, you dingus!' And I was like, 'Fuck! Alright! Just take it easy man!' And then the skeleton was like and I screamed and and he coccyx into me excruciating pain <dat-error404notfound1010000111101010>.
After that horror, I realized being an intern anywhere is a really easy job to get, since every other person who's written a pasta was an intern, too. So we were designing this prototype game called 'Sponges Don't Wear Ties!', which was kind of like some other game, but the name was totally different, and I can't remember it. But the NES cartridge was aggressive, and kept leaking hyper-realistic urine (anduthotiwuldseybludlololol) like a goddamn batman baby, so I melted it into fondue and the crew ate it. But then we all died, except for me, because I'm not so... yay... and stuff... and stuff... (Five internets to whoever gets that reference)
But anyway, the game the game was ugly and fat! And it was bad. It was still a better love story than twilight, however, and resulted in several emmy awards. And then, I learned the secret that the slime used in live Nickelodeon shows is actually Shrek's diarreah.
As for the game itself, it contained lotsa swearing, scary faces, skeletons popping out (which re-ignited repressed memories), sonic.exe, It, Cupcakes, John the Killer, and other NSFW shite like SCP-172 (anduthotiwuldsay3lololol). Here, see the prototype for yourself! It's real! (And not ripped off from awfulfafalthefalafael from youtube).
Written by Wolfe Malckovich
Content is available under CC BY-SA
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