Suite Life of Zack and Cody: The Lost Episode

It was a normal Saturday morning. I was walking down the street towards my friend Kyle's house when something caught my eye, a cd lay on the ground with its shiny side throwing sunlight into my eye.

Now, I happen to have a cd collection and am always looking for more to add to it. So I grabbed it up and looked at it. Written sloppily on the disk is The Salty Inhabitants of Jack and Broady.

Now normally I wouldn't give it any thought, but I noticed that it was a dvd and not a cd. So I continued to my friend Kyle's house so we could watch it.

I arrived at his house at around 12:32 and let myself in. His mom was cooking tortellini and I didn't think anything of it.

"Is Kyle home?" I asked.

"Yeah, he's in his room," she replied. "What's that you got there?"

"Its a movie," I said without missing a beat.

"Gimme that movie!" Kyle's dad screamed as he entered the room with a beard that strongly resembles garlic bread.

I did what any normal person would do, I ran for my flipping life towards Kyle's room, knocking pictures off the wall in the hallway and up the stairs.

I started pounding on Kyle's door, he opened it in a few seconds and let me in. Locking the door after. He had a giant poster of Newt from our favorite anime Cory in the House on the wall next to his window.

"Man, I found this dvd outside and your parents are freaking out trying to grab it from me," I inform out of breath. Heart pounding.

"What is it?" He asks trying to get a closer look.

I hold the tape out from my person.

"It's called The Salty Inhabitants of Jack and Broady."

"Let's watch it!" He grabs it from my hand and throws it in his Playstation One Tm.

It opens with the regular Suite Life opening. But the names aren't there and the quality is worse than normal. Almost like they had to make the quality bad to fit it on the dvd. Also All Star from Smash Mouth is playing instead of the normal theme tune.

It shows the two of them in a run down motel room standing in front of the tv with Shrek on it.

"Hey Broady, what do you want to do today?" Who I assume to be Jack asks.

"Lets go in the air ducts, that is always my favorite," Broady replies.

It cuts to the two of them in some dusty air vent. Jack pushes Broady down a narrow that leads to a large fan. It shows Broady explode as he lands in the fan into a billion little bits. The studio audience goes wild with laughter.

At this point I am a little weirded out, Kyle is too. He grabbed my hand and started crying like a little rapscallion.

It shows Mr. Mosby walking in the office of that rundown motel. Fez from That 70's Show walks in, he is wearing a wife beater and boxer shorts with little pictures of Shrek on them.

"Mr. Nosebee, I delivered the suitcases to the room like you asked," Fez says.

"You better have! Esteban!" Mr. Nosebee shouts even though it is obviously Fez from That 70's Show. Nosebee grabs a dirty, grimy, laser pistol and points it at him. "Did you get the dank?"

Fez tosses a little ziploc baggie of green stuff on Nosebee's desk.

"I am not Estabon, I am Fez," Fez informs with some sass.

"One more snap like that and you are fired! Esteban!" Nosebee shouts with a purple vein popping out on his head. He starts rolling up the green. "I sure love to smoke oregano".

Carey walks in carrying a sack of cheeseburgers.

"Hey, I got us some burgers and fries," Carey says as Cory from Cory in the House walks in.

"Hey guys, what did I miss!?" he shouts as the studio audience goes wild once again

Kyle starts slapping me on my shoulder like a son of a gun.

"Its Cory! Cory!" He shouts to the top of his lungs, licking his hand and starts fixing his hair.

Mr. Nosebee pulls out that laser pistol and shoots Cory in the neck.

Kyle starts crying on my shoulder and punching his pillow as I notice Kyle's dad's face in the window looking at us, but instead of eyes, he has tortellini as eyeballs in the sockets. I jump up and lock the window and close the blinds on that creep.

I look back at the tv and see that Mr. Nosebee has Paul Blart in a headlock. But Kyle's mom kicks the door down and punches me square in the eye. She too has tortolini as eyes.

Kyle gets scared and jumps out the window without opening it. I grab the sniper rifle Kyle keeps in his closet, jump out the window, and 420 no scope his mom through the temple.

Now, I know what you are thinking. How could I have murdered a person in such way. But she was no longer a human, when I shot her, she bled mtn dew.

I look over to see Kyle getting beat up by his Mtn Dew zombie dad. I quick scope tht newb and help Kyle up. We run back inside to finish the episode.

It shows Mr. Nosebee standing, looking at the camera with a dull expression.

"What is he doing?" Kyle asks.

"I don't know," I reply cleaning the sniper rifle.

But just then! Mr. Nosebee teleports straight out of the tv into Kyle's room!

I try to quick scope that crazy but he dodges it. Kyle grabs the machine pistol from his night table and starts blasting him away.

"You're gonna need more than that!" he says with a booming voice.

I hop up and punch im in the nose as hard as I can. But my knuckle breaks into 30 pieces and starts bleeding.

He grabs me with his giant arms and starts choking me, pulling the soul right from my person.

But just then! Kyle grabs the hand grenade he keeps on his shelf, pulls the little pin deally, and throws the cast iron explosive at that guy's face.

I jump out the window and land on Kyle's trampoline.

The explosion is so big it blew the roof off of Kyle's house. Kyle comes running out from his house and shouts:

"Quick! get in the car!" as he runs towards his mom's minivan.

I hop in the car and turn on the radio, Charli xcx new hit single I don't wanna break the rules, just wanna go to school is on.

Kyle throws the car in reverse and luckily drives over Mr. Nosebee. He peels out of the neighborhood and takes off.

"Where are we gonna go?" I ask.

"Somewhere we can change our names and start over," he replies

"But why?"

"To keep the fbi off our butts. They'll be searching for us because you killed my parents and blew up my house."

...

Update: Kyle and I moved to canada and changed our names, hair, and personalities. But the question still remains, what was up with that episode? Why was the spirit of Nosebee locked away on that disc, who would make such thing.

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