Super Scary Pasta Bros.

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You won't believe this, but yesterday I was playing Super Smash Bros. 4 and something super scary

happened!

I picked Yoshi and selected the Mario Kart (Brawl) stage. Every time Yoshi got hit during the fight his eyes spewed blood! Blood covered the road and the grass. Other fighters tripped on the blood. They stopped hitting Yoshi and, to my amazement, yelled at him.

Fox yelled, "Yoshi, are you on your period?"

Then Mario replied to Fox, "Yoshi is-a a guy!" Fox looked at Mario with a shocked expression. Everyone on screen stopped and looked at Mario.

"What?" said Wario, "Yoshi is a guy?!"

"Yes! Yoshi has-a always been-a a guy!" Mario replied, and he looked really mad. Yoshi was still stand in the same spot, the last drop of blood falling from his right eye. Everyone just looked at Mario, and then they all looked at Yoshi.

Suddenly, Robin yelled "Get the doctor!". The battle automatically stopped and went back to the fighter selection screen. Little Mac was replaced with Doctor Mario and a whole new match began.

"No," said Doctor Mario, "Yoshi has always been male." Everyone looked at Doctor Mario with a confused face.

"No, really, is this dinosaur a female or not?" asked Wario.

"I just told you--" Doctor Mario said before being interrupted by Robin.

"He's just like Mario! He believes in lies!" he screamed.

All this time Yoshi just looked at the ground. But now, finally he spoke. "Yoshi yoshi yoshi."

No one knew what he said, but by the power of bull, I translated him. He actually said, "Guys, take it from me, I am a male!"

But no one heard him. They grabbed his legs and looked in between them, but nothing was there. Then those characters, Fox, Robin, and Wario, went insane. They blabbed about how Yoshi was going to create a void in space and time. How Yoshi was impossible and that him being a guy wasn't possible.

"HE LAYS EGGS!" Fox screamed violently before shooting himself with his blaster. Blood came out of his head and Wario and Robin shrieked.

"FOX IS A FEMALE!!!"

Then my game disc blew up and this is why I can't show you photo proof of this 1293802947% true story.



Written by Roadkilled Squirrel‎
Content is available under CC BY-SA

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