Super Smash Bros. 64

I've played all three Super Smash Bros. games. I keep thinking to myself, "Maybe I shouldn't have given up so easily."

It all started when my family moved into our new house. It was pretty spacious and had lots of room. When we unpacked everything, which took about 3 weeks, I finally was able to pull out my Nintendo 64, Game Cube, and Wii. Among all of my games were The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, Silent Hill: Shattered Memories, and Super Mario 64. But the most predominant of my games were the Super Smash Bros. games.

I plugged in my Nintendo 64, and inserted Super Smash Bros. into the system. I would love to relive my old professional status once again. Everything seemed normal, up until I was at the character select screen. I saw that there were only 3 characters to play with, rather than the 12 I had. They were Link, Captain Falcon and Luigi. I chose Link, my favorite character overall, and decided to fight Captain Falcon. I chose the stage, Hyrule Castle.

When the match started, I widened my eyes to see just a dark background behind the stage. I paused the game to closely inspect the background, and went on to fighting. I kept beating up Captain Falcon like the usual, and I used U-Air to Star KO him. Instead of his normal Star KO, he asked, "Why did this have to happen to me?" The match was supposed to end.

I knew something was wrong when it didn't end. Link fell into tears, pounding the ground with his fist, asking, "Why did it come to this?"

I felt really bad for Link. Maybe he and Captain Falcon were best friends in the game. Soon, a darker, paler version of Captain Falcon appeared and the announcer said, "Ready? Go!" I used every single tactic to attack the darker Captain Falcon, but it didn't work. He just stood there, no frame data to support him.

I began to question what was wrong with the game. It was like brand new, and it was supposed to work correctly. I soon started to laugh at the fact that this dark version of Captain Falcon couldn't move, and that I could beat him up. I soon grabbed Captain Falcon and kicked him backwards, ultimately ending the fight. That raised even more questions about the game, though.

In the character select screen, I saw all of my characters, most except for Link and Luigi were pale and had red eyes for some reason. I made a straight face in some fear, and proceeded to play Classic Mode. When I got there, the same characters had the same thing. Suddenly, a loud ping bursted out of nowhere. I gave me a little headache, but I managed to take ibuprofen for it.

I began to play Classic Mode, but it skipped me to the Metal Mario stage. I thought this was even odder than what it seemed, but went along with the glitch. I managed to beat Metal Mario with Luigi, and it then brought me to the Master Hand stage. Master Hand appeared and said, "You are my creation!" I started to feel a bit unnerved by this, knowing that things wouldn't seem like they were.

When Master Hand had 50% damage left, he grabbed Luigi and squished him, turning him into another lifeless doll. It soon skipped me to the main menu, and the last character to play as was Link. I chose him, and Master Hand was in the level, having 50% damage.

I managed to dodge the grab, and attacked Master Hand with D-Air, and then F-Air. A cutscene appeared where Master Hand fell, and Link cut off all of its fingers and cut the hand in half. Toonish blood started to pour from the hand, making this a bit weird, again. I started to laugh at the whole thing, thinking that this must have just been a glitch overall in the game. But then, my laughter went to a halt and went to sympathy.

When I looked back at Link, he was on the ground again, saying, "All of my friends, they're dead. What is there any point to being here when your friends turn into hideous monsters like those? Why? Why, why, why, why, why, why? What the hell is this game? Some sick plot to kill us? Someone, tell me!" He soon looked at the screen, staring at it, as if he was staring at me. He looked up and soon, my cupboard was seen by him.

He pointed in fear at it, and I slowly walked towards it. It was my cupboard full of Nintendo toys. I looked at all of them, only to notice most of them were pale and had the red eyes.

I thought to myself, "Damnit! What is happening all of the sudden?" I heard Link scream from the TV, and looked back. The screen was black. It then turned to channel 67, truTV. I turned my Nintendo 64 off, and removed Super Smash Bros.

I am still trying to figure out what the hell happened to the game. I no longer try to have any urge to play SSB64 anymore, and started to play Melee and Brawl. I can hear my music box play weird music on its own...

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