THE MENACING MISCHIEF OF THE ULTIMATE POWER IN THE UNIVERSE STORY OF SHAGSONATH THE SPACE WARRIOR THE MILKY WAY ODYESSY ACROSS THE GALAXY ULTIMATE REVELATION PART II THE MADDENING CHOIR OF MADDEST MADNESS GONE MAD (EBOOK)
INTRO
WARNING: If you are not fluent in Arabic and Latin, you will die from exploding like a space star of Space Jihad!
Latinx: Si tu non es fluentum in Arabicam et Latinam, tu mortera de explodingus cum uno vacuum staruum du Space Jihadus!
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CHAPTER 1
Chapter 1: The late beginnings of the beginning of the end of the story of Shagsonath I, now (between parts) space-husband of Princess Deeta I, starting in a galaxy far far away in the centre, only before the supermassive black hole where Ligmas guard passage to the Hooyab Tundra in the Booyah Desert in half-time.
It was on the planet of Booyah CDXX wherein Shagsonath did the epic act of landing his peencraft upon the soils of Ogre Swamp in the non-desert planet of Booyah CDXX. He (Shagsonath I - husband of Deeta I) then retracted his robotic Shuttlecock with Shagsonath I - husband of Deeta I - and Deeta I - wife of Shagsonath I - being lowered onto this crispy island of dry ground.
"Shagsonath I the Jihad, I must tell you something." Deeta I the princess said nervously.
"What is it my love?" Shagsonath replied.
"I'm pregnant with your Jihad space babies." She announced.
Shagsonath of Booyah was left speechless. This must have been a gift from Space Allah himself (although a lot did happen between parts).
Before Shagsonath could express his joy, an Ogre of Ogre Swamp came to greet them. Ordinarily, a person would not understand an alien tongue, however, Shagsonath had intensively studied on his Kutub.
Here it should be added that Kutub also involves devices: Space Allah knows we don't read anymore.
"Salam alaikum!" the Ogre said enthusiastically.
Oops, wrong language.
"O ELLO THERE!" the Ogre actually said.
Wait, I can't keep giving handouts! You're MEANT to be fluent in Arabic!
"¡SALAM ALAIKUM!"
The Ogre, who called himself Shaquille O'Niel in human tongue, was an extensive follower of ordinary Islam (as all being were made to worship Allah) and was ready to upgrade to Islam of the Space kind as would be the wishes of Elon Mosque I, II, and Shesh Makesh I, II, III, IV, V and LXIX, as well as Space Allah himself. Shagsonath I, chosen to recite the Space Qu'ran, recited the Space Qu'ran.
The Space Shahadah had been witnessed by two Space Islamians, thus Shaquille O'Niel, the rockball-playing Booyah beast was become are Space Islam.
Faraway hideous Ligmas had wiretapped to hear the recitations live. They were not happy.
Galactic Emperor Ligma Ligma III the Ligma whose armies guard the Booyah Desert within the black hole, dispatched his mightiest squadron. This army squadron (which was an army squadron worth 2000 Ligmas (or two ordinary army squadrons (of 1000 Ligmas each))) was led by ten generals including: Prince-Ligma Ligma IV, Prince-Ligma Ligma VII, Grandmaster Proletius of the Deathknights of Space-Crail, Count Crocula - Lord of the Creps, and the ally from Neptune and son of Zark Muckerburg, Shark Muckerburg (who arrived via the warp drive of his personal spacecraft).
Two thousand aliens hovered over the planet and were blocking the skies, incinuating battle. They split into two groups, a 200 bomber squadron led by Proletius, and 1800 led by the remaining nine generals; Proletius ordered his army to bomb across the whole planet and slaughter the Booyahese peasants to destroy their food source and primary employments as the 1800 left swarmed into Shagsonath.
Covered in slimy, strange demons, Shagsonath struggled to break free. Until a chill wind caressed his ears.
"Shagsonatus..." it sang. Even this far from the black hole, it could imbue its power into Shagsonath.
The voices of the Maddening Opera of Maddest Madness Gone Mad© did inspire and invigorate the enthused Shagsonath. Fiery fire encircles him, then expands to push back the forces of evil.
The flames emanating from his longsword (sword, not penis) burned all those that touched it with pure Jihad energy from Space. Therein, the Ligmas were incinerated to reappear in the cosmic, godly, Allahly fires of Al Jahannam.
The battle for Booyah CDXX was won... But wait, there's more!
Only two generals from the blast still stood, for they were expert guitarists who could carry on through the fire and flames.
Suddenly the radiation of a hydrogen bomb blast was felt for a brief second. Proletius and most of his army had died from missiles of nuclear justice.
Shagsonath sliced at Prince-Ligma Ligma VII, but was deflected as he pulled out his Shredmax 5000™. The other survivor - Count Crocula - also had a Shredmax 5000™.
This was the cosmic power of the infinite shred machine.
"You are not fit to wield those guitars, evil imperials!" Shagsonath bellowed.
"Why should I take criticism from a guy with one... two sandals? Ah-ha-ha!"
Menacingly, he mischiefed over and broke Count Crocula's wrists and ankles.
"Cause you have carpal tunnel. You'll never love your fresh creps again."
Upon hearing this dreadful news, Crocula - Ex-Lord of the Creps - turned the guitar upon himself and took his own life.
Of the Ligmas, Prince-Ligma Ligma VII the Ligma, son of Ligma Ligma III and aquaintance of Dickward II the Balls (thus dubbed informally as Ligma the Balls) was the final Ligma standing. With the power of the chords, he played the most S I C K of shreds, which could shred the ears of the unattuned.
Fortunately, Shagsonath was TRVE KVLT, even without being Norwegian; therefore he resisted the blow glamorously.
To combat the power of the Shreds, Shagsonath used the power of the sword. Basically, he sliced Ligma VII in half.
Within Shagsonath was the force of a dragon.
CHAPTER 2
Chapter 2: The success over the battle of Ogre Swamp in Booyah CDXX in the favour of Shagsonath I the Jihad as he does Jihad of the space variety upon the Ligmas led by Ligma Ligma III (who deeply misses his sons) who stresses and grieves throughout the recharging of an overclocked son of a son of a lizard person Neptunian robot: Zark Muckerburg lives on through his aquatic-model son Shark Muckerburg - Epic cyborg Jihad battle commence!
Mighty Space Shagsonath has become victorious in these unexpected endeavours (killing Ligmas) and believes himself to have won.
The smell of farts pervades the marshland as does the crackle of electricity. Quiet falls upon the scene.
An electric sound goes 'vwooooo,' surprising Shagsonath. Two rocket boosters made a guy go 'nyoom!' and slam into him.
Stumbling to the ground Shagsonath groaned (hey, that rhymed!) and then jumped to his feet. The assailant was none other than a supercharged, water-cooled Shark Muckerburg.
If you're wondering, Shark's signature involves all capital letters and a cool S.
Shagsonath prepared for the fight to decide the fate of Ogre Swamp, as water jets spewed from many cannons on Shark's hull. One jet pierced through the hiding place of the once-happy Shaquille O'Niel, killing him dead. As his incorporeal ghost ascended to Space Jannah, Shagsonath became wrathful.
He charged in with his sword, forgetting water puts out fire, and was blown backwards.
"Biggus dickus..." The choir voice spoke.
Shathsonag began to activate the Shuttlecock, creating a shuttle-sized cock lazer gun; firing beams that nullified the water. Whilst his wang (王) was left on autopilot for defence, Shagsonath created an almighty basketball in his hand.
Shark attempted to dodge the ball, but it bounced everywhere and was overfast. Even with the speedyspeed, Shark's outer electron™ shell was smashed to pieces.
Then, the torso opened to reveal a living being inside. Shark Muckerburg was piloted by cat shark Gawr Gura.
"A" She said menacingly.
The Shag of Nath was still ballin'. And indomitable aqua shell encased Gura and protected her from the balls. One thing could be heard from the pssshshshstt.
"When the impostor is sus..."
Without time to react, a water spaceman - crewmate from the hit game Among Us - did a task where he obliterated out hero's nipples with an almighty twist, before a hydration beam killed it and sent Shagsonath flying around the world, around the world.
Taking a second to brainthink®, Shagsonath concluded that Gura could not hear very well beind the water dome.
"Sharklettingdownherwaterdomesayswhat!"
"What?" The impenetrableble gurard splashed away.
Shagsonath charged in with his blazing blaze blade; this time, fire put out water. So now she dead, Gura supah dead.
Before the Twitter mob could notice, Shagsonath kisses Deeta I, princess of something idk and abandon's the planet in his cockshuttle to ride into the supermassive black hole to find the Hooyab Tundra inside the Booyah Desert inside the super massive supermassive black hole with his cock shuttle traversing the vast cosmos of the galaxies of the clusters of the universe.
CHAPTER 3
Chapter 3: Shagsonath approaches like a storm towards his glorious spaghettification within the supermassive black hole of great size (and super mass) encasing the Booyah desert encasing the Hooyab Tundra encasing the aforementioned madness choir within the centres of respected ringularities, but not before fighting a giant robot for passage instead of just going around it.
Dickward had coalesced together, back from the brinkly coiled hold of death, as susdust© fused with martian nebula and solar flares called forth from the darkest reaches of the most empty cosmos. Fuelled with coldest death powers, his ritual to create the portal to Hooyab was underway with macabre, menacing mischief.
Shagsonath could sense a most evil, malicious, malefic, maleficent, ill, evil presence worming its way with necromancy to the singularity.
After this impending danger of horrible doom, a monstrous titan robot - constructed in haste - was imposing Shagsonath's right of passage. Thwapped, the Jihadlord was sent off-course and was engaged in avoidable conflict: a battle was fight.
Beauty in the stratos like a sea of unhitting laser beams, as laser beams were fired on both sides and never hit.
Into the ejector within the cockpit (haha) Shagsonath inserted his fire sword as his hornéd craft jousted into giant fighting robot; tore it asunder. Triumphantly, he retracted the blade to the sheath on his person and flew with procrastinated haste.
"Dickus Wardus..." the fearful cacophony of the eternal choir warned his presence.
Approaching the black hole of supper massive supermassiveness, Shagsonath was stretched into infinite string during the freezing of then frozen time on the outside sequential to reforming at the gates of the Booyah Desert. He kicked up a gnarly sand wave, surfing it towards the land of ice.
"Cassus belli..."
"Dickward!"
"Ar-ha, ar-ha, ar-ha, ar-ha!" the dick-nosed, dick-warded one replied, "When I push this button, the doors to the Hooyab Choir Temple will explode! With my Scarlet Mohawk of Unfettered Speed which I gained from the cold solar heats and the martian nebulae, I shall blast past you and reach for the power the likes of this world have never seen! Ar-ha, ar-ha, ar-ha, ar-ha!"
"Such Shaytanry!" gasped Shagsonath. The button of all buttons was pressed in the pressing time. Marble and debris scattered across the arctic land with no magnetic fields to distinguish the Arctic and Antarctic.
Rushing into the temple halls, chased valiantly by Shagsonath, the soulless ginger beast of Dickward III the Torture dared outmatch him. A wide opening led into a final room supported by columns where statuettes of the eternal singers did do their singing.
Symphonic acapella rang across the building, as Shagsonath and Dickward clashed at the speed of sound. The claymore of fire did little to the indoors permafrost; when he struck, the necromancer avoided and headed to the pedestal at the back edge of the chamber.
With might, Shagsonath unearthed his weapon from the tiles, de-iced with magic hotness, and tried his best to Jihad in the here and now. His nefarious, necrotic foe crowned of crimson hairs was simply too fast to catch up with, confounding the swift power of the Mohawk.
The Fatherless One - son of Dickward II - reached out suddenly, grasping the relic in his hand: The Staff of Freezing Cold Ice of Absolute Zero Coldness. With a triumphant 'ar-ha, ar-ha, ar-ha, ar-ha!' the Dick had triumphed this day.
Then, suddenly again, the cold staff unlike all other staves of magic unleashed a spell of aeons old. And so it came to pass that the whole temple had frozen over, leaving the two fighters immobile for timeless months.
In this state, all Shagsonath could do was months of Salah and meditation for the glory of Space Islam, Space Jihad, Space Allah and his space-ancestors Elon Mosque I, II, and Shesh Makesh I, II, III, IV, V and LXIX. Soon, the time again would arise to make battle in outer intergalactic space when they thaw once again to disappear from the frigid Hooyab Tundra.
The choir sang in performance to the two new statues: The Maddening Opera of Maddest Madness Gone Mad.
" Shagsonatus
Biggus dickus
Dickus Wardus
Cassus belli
Deus Chungus
Canadius
IVDEX FABA
Sheshemakesh
Magnum opus
Fratres ruber
Dominusus
Amgogusus
Ite infernum
Cum secula
Daemonis nostra
Lupus canis
ANANAS... "
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