The Big Bad Butt Monster
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NSFW WARNING
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Once upon a time....
There was a man named Bob. Bob was bored and wanted to go adventuring, so he packed his bags and went to Alligator Shit Swamp. The swamp was called that because that's where alligators go to shit. When he arrived at a picnic table near the swamp, he saw an old man. The old man said something. "Beware, young person, for that is the swamp in which the Big Bad Butt Monster resides. I would just stay here if I was in your shoes, but I'm not, I'm in these shitty White Vans that I got because of an equally shitty meme." Bob knew all about the Butt Monster, and his tragic past.
A long time ago, before the White Man destroyed America with fast food restaurants and Donald Trump, there was a tribe called the Buuti tribe, who had the juiciest butts out of all the world's people. The chieftain, Hugh Janus, loved his tribe. However, the rivaling Chinpoko tribe killed the majority of his clan by farting on them until they died. They used their small penises to piss on the corpses, and then cut of Hugh's head. Then the Chinpoko chief shoved the decapitated head up his ass. Ever since then, his spirit haunts the Alligator Shit Swamp, with a big ass for shoving people into it.
Bob laughed it off as a "fable" for people to not go in the shit-infested swamp. He felt adventurous, and no man, beast, or butt monster would stop him from having fun. So he threw his boat next to the small port that was at the edge of the swamp. Right before swimming away, the old man whispered to himself. "Hope you like tasting ass, motherfucker."
As Bob was heading into the dark section of the swamp, he noticed that the swamp smelled like fresh shit. He shrugged it off and assumed that it was from the many alligators. Throughout his romp, he found many interesting sights, like a python swallowing an alligator dick first, the elusive Skunk-Ape whipping his cock out for Harambe, then forgetting what he was doing and jacking off afterwards, and the remains of a once Disney theme park overrun by weirdos in Mickey Mouse suits destroying Cars-related merchandise. But the biggest surprise was near the end of his journey. He saw a big, round, pale, blurry shape. He first thought it was an albino alligator, a white cougar, or that big ball thing from EPCOT. To his horror, the thing slowly rised out of the water and revealed itself to be a giant ass. Bob was petrified, curling up into a fetal position and crying. It was the Big Bad Butt Monster. The twisted, pale head turned towards Bob with demonic red eyes staring deep into his soul. "YOU FUCKING IDIOT!!!!!! SINCE YOU DIDN'T LISTEN TO THE WARNINGS, YOU WILL KISS MY ASS!!!!!1" The ghastly spirit picked up Bob by the shirt and shoved the poor man deep into his rectum. The last thing Bob heard was a big, loud fart.
The next day, a newspaper came up. "Local man Bob found missing, last seen near Alligator Shit Swamp." An old man read the paper and said to himself, "I should've helped him, but I'm an oooooooooooold man."
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