The Jar Jar Curse

From Trollpasta Wiki
Jump to navigationJump to search

I was a Star wars fan since I watched Star Wars in 1977. I was very lucky to win a visit to George Lucas. I was in the bus for hours. I passed the time by playing Angry Birds. The bus then finally came to a stop. I stepped out from the bus and I was infront of the Skywalker Ranch. I knocked on the door. I had to wait for 1 hour, so I decided to do the same thing I did on the bus. Unfortunately, my phone was dead. I became bored. Finally, I heard the door open. It was George Lucas! I remember him from the first time I watched the first film. However, things started to become odd. George's face had a extremely scared look, with tears slowly coming out of his eyes. I asked him what happened. He was speechless, but he managed to say "J-j-j-j-jar....dreams...". Wait a minute, I had to use a flashback. In it, it was 1999, the year I watched Episode 1. The movie was terrible, all of because of that CG-shit, such as the Gungans, Jar Jar--Wait a second, if George Lucas mentioned "jar", then it was Jar Jar Binks, who was haunting George Lucas' dreams. However, we heard a Gungan voice. We quickly went inside it. We heard static coming from the TV. It was in the living room, so we went inside. The TV showed nothing but static. We heard the Gungan noise, this time being "Why do you-sa hate me-sa?" The static began to lower, showing a angry Jar Jar Binks with red eyes. It also showed Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford and Carrie Fisher hung up. He had a really angry look on his face. He said in a demonic voice "You-sa will all die-sa!" I heard a man scream. I quickly looked back. George Lucas died! He was lying on the door, motionless, with blood coming out of his eyeholes, and his eyes were gone. Blood was also dripping out of his arm. I ran for my life. I rode the bus to home. Ever since I saw George Lucas die, I never spoke a word about Star Wars. I never watched a single film of it. I never read one book about Star Wars. I buried all of my Star Wars stuff. I always had the horrified look on my face, just like George's. One night, I had a nightmare. I was in Tatoonie. The buildings are all in ruins, Luke Skywalker and Han Solo were dead at the same time, the Jedis were lying on the floor, motionless, even the Masters. They all have missing eyes and blood coming out of their eyesockets. Many Republic and Rebellion ships have already crashed. The worst thing was this demonic Gungan laugh. The voice then said, "Hello-sa... Wanna give me-sa a good rating-sa...?" I said, "NEVER!!! You CG-shit are ruining Episode 1!" The voice said, "That's it." The dead Jedi Younglings, Padawans, Knights and Masters came back alive... as zombies. They had blood over their faces and their tattered clothes. They are even armed with lightsabers. I ran for my life, only to encounter zombie Jedi Masters. They can use their Force still good, so they flung me up and then down with it. The giant ghost of Jar Jar Binks then appeared. It said, "Yes... That's exactly what I wanted!" I immediately woke up. Covered in blood, I still had that horrified face, only worse. I went to the Skywalker Ranch, only to see it in ruins, and covered in flames. Then, I heard that demonic laugh. I looked back, to see... Jar Jar Binks, who already had gone commando before I woke up. He looks very lifelike. He said in a demonic voice, "Hello-sa... Wanna stop-sa humiliating us-sa Gungans...?" It took me a while to reply. I then snapped finally said, "NEVER! You CG-shit are still ruining the Prequel Triology!". He then said, "You still asked for it. He disappeared so fast I don't know anymore. I ran for my life, but I tripped over and lost consciousness. I was in that dream again, except I was now in a heavily deteriorated Death Star. Just like in the first dream, Stormtroopers, Rebels and Darths were dead. The most horrifying part is that Luke Skywalker, Han Solo and Princess Leia were dead. The interior have heavily corroded too. The same demonic laugh is present. I heard, "Look at what have you've done....." Then, Jar Jar appeared. He said, "Wanna play a game?" I quickly said, "Never!" He then said, "Okay, here's your reward...". And there comes half-zombie half-skeleton Rebels, Darths and Stormtroopers (Yes, The main characters of the movies too.) rising from the dead. I ran into the Millennium Eagle, only to find Han Solo as a zombie. Before I got killed, I then went in the other direction before being stopped by the zombies. I then realized it was just a dream, and decided to pinch my ass. Whew! I then woke up in my house, except it was destroyed, and up in flames. I then realized that Jar Jar is still out there. Once again, I heard that goddamned laugh of that motherfucker. I looked back and saw fucking Jar Jar Binks, now hyper-realistic.

Comments • 0
Loading comments...