The Mew Mew Massacre

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The following "creepy"pasta that you are about to read was written by me back when I was about 10 years old. As such, the pasta is very poorly written (IIRC, I wrote the first chapter in under an hour), and contains many flaws, including a clear lack of knowledge regarding the source material, several grammatical mistakes ("leathal injection" comes to mind), many plot holes, and copious amounts of swearing, for some reason. As of the writing of this disclaimer, I'm working on a rewrite of the pasta so that I can finally be rid of the guilt I feel every day for writing this bullshit out.
And before you ask, yes, I am aware that some brave soul decided to put this piece of shit on Trollpasta Wiki. And for that, I salute thee.



This is a blog about a 18 year old boy named Warren, who receives a VHS tape of a lost episode from the Japanese anime Tokyo Mew Mew. Please note that the following blog contains content which may not be suitable for younger viewers.

Post 1 (March 20, 2016)

A screenshot of Thiscryn

Anybody heard of the magical girl anime Tokyo Mew Mew? Well, I have a VHS tape of Episode 53. Yes, there was an unreleased episode AFTER Episode 52, which was the finale of the entire series. It might've just been a joke episode, but I doubt it. This was actually shown on TV on June 13th, 2003. What's creepy about it? It was aired on Friday the 13th. Yes, it was aired on Friday the 13th. I heard on May 31st, 2003 that 12 4Kids employees were killed so the English version of this episode could be aired. Anyways, both Japanese and American parents ranted heavily about how the episode should've never been aired, as their children were crying in fear. One even started a protest rally to arrest Mia Ikumi! That's right, A PROTEST RALLY TO ARREST THE CREATOR OF TOKYO MEW MEW! Mia actually ended up in court, but she claimed she had "no knowledge of the episode", and therefore she was set free.

So, a week ago, I was walking my cousin's dog, when I came across a VHS tape. It had something on it written in red marker (or maybe blood). I picked it up, and it read "Tokyo Mew Mew Episode 53 - The Mew Mew Massacre Has Come, Nya!". I decided to go home, because I wanted to watch it. I went back to my house and proceeded to put it in my VHS player. I then sat in a chair and watched it. The first 10 seconds were filled with static, but the surprising thing is that during the 5th second, Ichigo's shadow can be seen. The shadow only lasted for a split second, so I couldn't describe how it looked, but one thing was that the shadow had red eyes. Glowing red eyes. Once the static was over, there was a black screen for 3 seconds. And once the black screen was over, the episode finally played.

It started with Kisshu holding a gun and looking sad. Pai and Tart then approach him, curious about the gun. Tart proceeds to say "B-brother, why are you holding a g-g-gun?". Pai replies with "Yeah, that's an answer we need Kisshu,". Kisshu turns around, crying quite realistically. The tears looked like drops of water rolling down my TV. Kisshu then mutters "I want to die. Goodbye cruel world". Pai says "WHAT?! Kisshu, you know that you have so much to live for! You can't just commit suicide!". Kisshu then puts his gun up to his head, as he says "It's too late, Pai and Tart. I'm dying". But as he is about to pull the trigger, he aims at Pai and shoots him, with a evil grin on his face. Tart says "Kisshu?! What has gotten into you?!", with a scared look on his face. Kisshu then says "Time to die, bitch!" to Tart, as he shoots him. At this point, I was thinking "WTF? KISSHU JUST SWORE!". Anyways, back to the episode. The beggining faded out to black as Kisshu says "That should teach those motherfuckers a lesson...". Kisshu swore again!

Thankfully, it cut to the intro, which was the typical intro, however, it was highly distorted. Some parts played backwards. A high pitched beep interrupted the theme song 4 times, and halfway through the intro, I heard a low pitched, backwards voice say "I WILL STEAL YOUR SOUL!". Once the intro was over, the title card showed itself. And when that was over, it cut to Cafe Mew Mew, where Ryou is tied to a wall. Keiichiro said "Well, fucker, never underestimate the power of me!". At this point, I learned that swearing was common in this episode. Ryou said "Let me down! Let me dowwwwwwwwwn!", as he wiggled left and right. Keiichiro replied "Too bad! This is what you get for being a pile of shit!", as he pressed a button. A saw appeared just right below Ryou, and the metal portion of the wall he is tied to moves down to the ground, shredding Ryou. I was shocked at this point. There was organs and blood flying everywhere. Finally, it shows that only Ryou's face remains. He is speechless, as his voice box has been destroyed. Keiichiro puts Ryou's head on a table, and slices the front of it with a knife. He slices it into multiple pieces and then spreads them out. That one death made Happy Tree Friends look like a show that would air on Sprout, when it's actually very gory! Keiichiro proceeds say "Time to get busy" in a straight voice. It then cuts to Keiichiro putting the pieces of Ryou's face into several pies, and then baking them, melting the pieces of Ryou's face.

We then see the girls entering the cafe. Ichigo says "Hey Keiichiro, where's Ryou?". Keiichiro said "Oh, he's just on a vacation with his family," chuckling. Ichigo replied "Okay. Then what are those pies on the tables?". Keiichiro said "Listen, girls. I need you to try out those pies. They're free samples!". Pudding said "We get to try out free samples of pies? Awesome!". The girls then proceed to eat their pies. It then cuts to after the girls are finished with their pies. Each girl hasn't finished their pie, because they only took a bite out of it. But Ichigo, however, ate her entire pie. She then proceeds to say "I-I want blood. I want everyone's blood. HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA! I WILL TASTE EVERYONE'S BLOOD! HAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!". I was scared by this.

Ichigo grabbed a knife and said "I wonder what your blood types are, because time to feast, bitches!". Ichigo then grabbed Mint, slammed her on the ground, and cut open her torso. Ichigo, officialy bloodthirsty, ripped out Mint's heart and took a bite out of it. Bloodthirsty Ichigo said "Yum! That tastes good!" and ate the rest of Mint's heart. Lettuce, Pudding, and Zakuro proceeded to run out of the cafe, when all of a sudden, Kisshu shows up and shoots Pudding and Zakuro. Lettuce runs back into the cafe, but then is cornered by Bloodthirsty Ichigo and Killer Kisshu. Kisshu says "Time for you to die, four eyes! I never even liked you, bastard!". Kisshu then shoots Lettuce, as she falls down on the ground and dies. Bloodthirsty Ichigo says "Thanks, Kisshu!", when all of a sudden, Masaya shows up. He then says "Ichigo, what the hell are you doing?", just before getting shot multiple times by Kisshu. Masaya then collapses. His head then bursts open on impact with the hard floor of the cafe.

Keiichiro finally sees what is going on and says "Wow, Kisshu, I never thought you were an amazing alien! Want to prepare for a feast?". Kisshu says "Of blood, Keiichiro? Yes! I want to drink blood and eat hearts!". The screen then fades out to black for 1 second, and then resumes, where we see Lettuce's heart, Pudding's severed legs, and Zakuro's lungs being eaten by Kisshu and Ichigo. And then Ichigo says "Mmmmmmmm! I want more!" as the episode ends, and the credits roll. I was traumatized by that episode. I immediately turned my VHS player off, ejected the tape, and smashed it. I looked up "The Mew Mew Massacre" on Yahoo, and I heard that there were multiple people that recieved chain mails. They all read this:

"Hi! I just wanna ask you one question: what's you're blood type? I hope it's good, because I'll be drinking your blood pretty soon! ~ Ichigo. P.S. I know where you live!"

If you get this email, do not reply to it, or else the mastermind behind this episode may find you and kill you.

Post 2 (March 21, 2016)

Hey, guys.

I need to talk quick. You know about the figure that appeared in the static, right? Well, that figure was a warning. After I destroyed the VHS, the figure must've known that I did that, so now it's stalking me. I first saw the figure in the morning. When I looked outside of my window, I saw the figure. Staring right at me. I wanted to shoot it, but I didn't have a gun, so I ran out of my room and went to the kitchen to get some breakfast. After breakfest, I went outside to check for the figure, but it wasn't there. I shrugged and went back into the kitchen, but then, at the last second, I noticed a dusty copy of Tokyo Mew Mew Volume 1. It looked like it had been destroyed HEAVILY. I decided to check out it's contents. Nothing different from another copy, EXCEPT on the very first page (before the book begins), there was something written in red marker. It read this:

"YOU'RE TOO LATE NOW. YOU'RE NEXT, WARREN! ~ ICHIGO"

I got so scared, I dashed into the house. How did Ichigo know my name? I knew the mastermind did this (the one behind the emails and the murders of the 12 4kids employees) to creep me out more. Furious, I got a match and lit the book on fire. I didn't want Tokyo Mew Mew in my house anymore. But I knew, no matter what I would do, it would just come back to me.

And then, the doorbell rang.

"OH SHIT! HE'S HERE!" I yelled. The doorbell almost sent me into cardiac arrest! But I then thought that I was safe, so I opened the door. And then guess who came in? Two police officers, WITH ICHIGO HANDCUFFED! And then one of them said "Sir, we need to talk to you".

I told them to sit down and then we could talk.

"Why are you here?" I asked them. I was curious why they had came in the first place. "Well, Warren, we heard about the VHS tape you have picked up. It is actually haunted. If you didn't destroy it, you would've died. But you didn't keep it. We are very happy. Tonight, Ichigo will be executed using leathal injection. We will keep the blood away from her, so don't worry. She will die", they said.

"OH MY FUCKING GOD, YEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSS!" I shouted. "ICHIGO'S GONNA DIE, YOU HEAR THAT BITCH?" Ichigo looked at me for a bit. Then she started to get a grin on her face. Within a minute or two, Ichigo was smiling while looking at me. She said "Waaaaaaarrrreeeeeennnnnn, Iiiiiiiiiiiii caaaaaannnnnnnnn'tttttttt waaaaaaaiiiiiiittttttt tttttttooooo ssssseeeeeeeeee yyyyyyooooouuuu iiiiinnnn hhhhheeeellllllllll".

WTF?! I was a good man! I would never go to hell! But then the cops left with Ichigo. The 2nd one said "Meet us tonight at the state prison for Ichigo's execution, Warren".

I am currently waiting for Ichigo to die. Her blood level is getting very low. Take that, fucker!

Post 3 (April 28, 2016)

HOLY SHIT! I had a severely bad day today.

Over the time I was gone, I watched a lot of Super Mario Logan to calm myself down. However, the characters kept referring to eachother as "Ichigo".

Today, I watched "Bowser Jr. Gets Rabies", but, halfway through the video, I was directed to a video named "HELP ME". It was a minute long, and it was of the figure staring right at me. At the last second, the figure's face popped up on my computer's screen, and played the Max and Ruby 0004 scream at full blast. The video (Bowser Jr. Gets Rabies) then resumed.

I am so fucking scared. I have to go to the police department now to discuss the VHS tape with the police, so, bye.

Post 4 (May 1, 2016)

It's nice to be back posting on this blog! or, maybe not...

So, today, I saw a girl in Ichigo cosplay. She walked up to me and said "I need something..." I replied "What do you need?". The girl then ripped off her skin and yelled "YOUR SOUL!". The girl, who had turned out to be none other than the figure, chased after me. I immediately got into my car and drove back home.

One hour ago, I was relaxing, when I realized I got mail. I rushed to the mailbox and found only 1 envelope. I opened it, and I found a YouTube link on a piece of paper. So, I copied the link onto my computer, and a private video popped up. It started with the figure grabbing a 4 year old girl and forcing her into a van. The figure then proceeds to get inside the van and kill her, while laughing. The girl's screams shocked me, which later turned into gurgles. After 10 minutes of this, the figure bursts out of the van, with a mangled, bloody corpse that once belonged to the girl. The screen then went black, and the Max and Ruby 0004 scream played at full blast. My computer later got fried.

I fucking hate that figure. That's enough for now, so, bye.

Bonus Post 1: Advice (May 8, 2016)

Today, I'll take a break from normal posts, and I'll instead give out some advice. PLEASE follow this, or else you may become victim to the figure.

  • Never, EVER draw an Illuminati at 12:00 A.M. and say the rosary backwards. If you have, you've invited the figure to stay at your house, and this cannot be undone.
  • Never look up "bloodthirsty ichigo", "ichigo shadow", or "evil ichigo" on YouTube and click the first video. It will automatically redirect to the video of the 4 year old girl's murder.
  • Do NOT try to call Bloodthirsty Ichigo or the figure. If you have called one of them, you only have a few days left to live.

Never do these, EVER! Warren out!

Post 5 (May 29, 2016)

Tor.

Tor is evil. Recently, I decided to check out the deep web, and I saw something quite disturbing. I clicked on a random gif that said "CLICK TO PLAY", and then, all of a sudden, a weird being named "Thiscryn" (the image had a caption) popped up and screamed.

I uninstalled Tor and darted up to my room. I am shivering in fear right now. If you have seen Thiscryn right now, please tell me if it has a relation to the lost episode I saw.

Post 6 (??????)

FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU


oh...ryou, what will we do with you...

Post 7 (October 21, 2016)

Ooooooooookayyy, so it's weird that I'm posting here again, and here's why: During the entire months of June, July, August, and September, I didn't see anything unusual. However, I did inspect my PSX games and my memory card. I didn't see anything unusual there. However, now, the mastermind has realized I have been posting on this website and has not only made Post 6, but also SCP-2958, a.k.a. Masha from Tokyo Mew Mew.

Another unusual thing is that at the start of the month, I woke up in a gooey, bubbly substance, and I was not in my house. Then, I saw it: the bodies of the latter 4 Mew Mews on a wall. Mint's body was hung by a noose, Lettuce's body was chained to the wall by handcuffs, Pudding's body was hanging by her spinal cord, and Zakuro's body was on a cross, just like Jesus. I was about to leave, when all of a sudden, I heard a voice say "Warren, you're not leaving, no da...". I looked behind me, and the bodies of the girls were walking towards me. Mint looked like she died from falling, Lettuce looked like she died from drowning, Pudding looked like she died from suffocation, and Zakuro looked like she died from a fatal injury. I knew what to do: run. I discovered that the place I was in was the cafe. I could see Masaya's head, bashed open, with blood on the floor and eyeballs floating in it. I got past Masaya and slammed the cafe doors. And then, all of a sudden, I woke up, implying that my experience was only a dream.

I'm gonna have to put this blog on hiatus until I have a very unusual experience. Until then, Warren out!

Post 8 (December 26, 2016)

Nothing really unusual to post about, but I still think it's kinda unusual. Anyways, on December 1st, I was shoveling snow, when all of a sudden, the figure rised out of the snow and started chanting "Come at me, you motherfucking bitch....", which got annoying, so I whacked the figure with my shovel. It teleported behind me and then disappeared before I could whack it again.

Needless to say, the snow is still there. For Christmas, my cousin gave me a new horror...The Mew Mew Massacre 2. It wasn't on VHS, it was on LaserDisc. Anyways, when I booted it up, it was primarily about Ichigo staring at the screen in freakish CGI with her eyes gouged out and chanting in a horrifying voice "COME AT ME BITCH" 50 times. Once it was over, I tried burning Super Mario Logan on the LaserDisc. It worked, at least for a minute. Then it resumed to The Mew Mew Massacre 2. I decided to throw the LaserDisc out of my bedroom window and smash it with a hammer. My cousin was just staring at me with a facial expression which basically represents "The fuck?". The figure then appeared and threw my cousin at my car. The car was damaged, and my cousin had severe injuries, so I had to rush her to the hospital.

She is currently in the hospital, running the risk of dying. Thanks a lot, Figure. You motherfucking dumbass.

Post 9 (February 17, 2017)

Remember how my cousin was badly injured by the Figure? She died on January 12th. May she Rest In Peace. I was there to see her die. And guess what? I heard the figure laughing and saying "I killed your dumbass cousin...ha ha, ha ha...".

On a side note, I've devoloped a theory. What does Thiscryn mean? Thiscryn's done nothing except scare me one time. But what is Thiscryn is real? What if Thiscryn....is the mastermind? Anyways, I want to make this short, so Warren out!

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