The Mocha Muscleman
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NSFW WARNING
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The "Crews Game" is an old Pegasister ritual, used mainly as punishment for those who have broken the laws of the Pegasusususes religion in question.
While it was mainly used as a scare tactic to not disobey MoBrosStudios, there is still a very existent chance of gonorrhea to those who play the Crews Game.
There is an even higher chance of permanent anal scarring. It is highly recommended that you DO NOT PLAY THE CREWS GAME.
However, for those few arousal seekers searching for an orgasm or for those delving into obscure smexy rituals, these are simple instructions on how to play. Do so at your own risk...
Instructions
PREREQUISITES:
It must be exactly 12:00 AM when you begin performing the ritual. Otherwise, it will not work.
MATERIALS:
You will need a candle, a piece of paper, a writing implement, matches or a lighter, smegma, a wooden door, and at least one drop of your own sperm. If you are playing with multiple people, they will need their own of the aforementioned materials and they will have to perform the steps below accordingly.
STEP 1: Cut a hole in a box
Write your full name (first, middle, and last) on the piece of paper. Put at least one drop of semen on the paper. Allow it to soak into the paper.
STEP 2: Put yo junk in that box
Turn off all of the lights in the place you are doing this. Go to your wooden door, and place the paper with your name on it in front of the door. Now, take out the candle and light it. Place it on top of the paper.
STEP 3: Have her open the box
Knock on the door twenty-two times. The hour must be 12:00 AM upon the final knock. Then, open the door, blow your mom, and close the door. You have just allowed Terry Crews "The Mocha Muscleman" to enter your house.
STEP 4: and that's the way you do it It's a dick in a box!
Immediately relight your candle.
This is where the game begins. You must now lurk around your now completely dark house, with the lit candle in your hand. Your goal is to avoid the mocha muscleman at all costs, until 3:33 AM. Should your candle ever go out, that means the Mocha Muscleman is near you. You must relight your candle in the next ten seconds.
If you are not successful in doing this, you must then immediately surround yourself with a circle of smegma. If you are unsuccessful in both of your actions, the Mocha Muscleman will go into your sisters room, grab a dildo, come back and shove it up Uranus and you will feel it, but you will be unable to orgasm.
If you are successful in creating the circle of smegma, you must remain in there until 3:33 AM.
If you are successful in relighting your candle, you may proceed with the game. You must continue to 3:33 AM, without being fucked by the Mocha Muscleman, or being trapped inside the circle of smegma, to win the Crews Game. The Mocha Muscleman will leave your house at 3:33 AM, and you will be safe to proceed with your masturbation.
ADDITION:
Indications that you are near the Mocha Muscleman will include sudden bulge in your pants, seeing a pure black, humanoid dick waving around in the darkness, and hearing very sexual whispering coming from an indiscernible source. If you experience any of these, it is advised that you leave the area to avoid the Mocha Muscleman.
DO NOT turn any of the lights on during the Crews Game. They say if looks could kill, he is too damn sexy.
DO NOT wave your flashlight back and forth.
DO NOT go to sleep during the Crews Game.
DO NOT attempt to use another person's sperm on your name.
DO NOT use a strap on as a substitute for your penis, It will not work.
AND DEFINITELY DO NOT attempt to provoke the Mocha Muscleman in ANY WAY.
Even when the game is over, he will always be watching you masturbate...
Good fuck, you are going to get one.
Speak now or forever hold your penis!
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