The Totally Legit How I Met Your Mother Theory

Kids, have I ever told you the story of How I Met Your Mother?

How I Met Your Mother was a show that ran from 2005 to 2014 about a New York architect named Ted Moseby trying to find "true love" with his friends Marshal, his wife Lily, Barney and his eventual wife Robin. Basically the whole show is of Ted in the future telling his kids the story of how he met their mother, hence the name. It somehow took almost ten years for him to finish the story and, in the end, it turns out that Ted was just telling the huge story to convey to his kids that he wanted to fuck Robin because his original wife died and Barney divorced Robin in 2014. Spoilers, by the way.

How I Met Your Mother was actually based on the real life of Walter White the Science Guy, who worked as a drug dealer in the ghettos of New York. He also had several mental disorders, including multiple personality disorder, causing him to also be three other people, named Ted Moseby, Marshal Ericson and Barney Stinson. Walter White the Science Guy was making a lot of good money from his drug dealing and never wanted to be tied down, but he often bought prostitutes. The first prostitute, Lily, he had sex with as Marshal and she got pregnant, forcing his Marshal personality to end up in a marriage with her. The second one, Robin, he had sex with as Barney, and luckily she couldn't have kids, so he left her and they never saw each other again. The third one, the mother, he impregnated as Ted and got roped into marriage with her, and ended up having another kid. Finally, his Barney personality decided to fuck a bitch every night for a month and succeeded, but got the final one pregnant. Walter White the Science Guy's life was tossed around by all his personalities and he wrote a long story that followed the life of his other personalities before committing suicide. The story was found and made into a television show.

You might ask, "How can you know that all of this happened?" Well nobody ever knew that I'm actually the original personality of Walter White the Science Guy and he was one of the four personalities made up by my multiple personality disorder. My name is Bill Nye the Cancerous Meth Dealer.

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