The hyper-vampiric ritual

So there is a ritual that does something, though nobody knows what for sure. Some say you go inside game. Some say a man sized penguin appears behind you! Some say you experience a permanent acid trip. But whatever happens, it must be terrible, terribly awesome! The ritual goes as such.

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"Blood and computers. Gore and extension files. I call upon you now to invoke Sonic.exe!

Give me food! Give fire! Give me everything I desire! 

This body, this body holding me reminds me that I am not alone!

This body, this body holding me reminds me that pain is an illusion!

So mote it be!"

Materials:

A floppy disk

5 ounces of your own blood

A rigged wire (for the xbox and leap frog)

A leap frog tablet

An original Xbox

A ritual knife

Instructions:

Open up the xbox and place the floppy disk inside. Make sure it doesn't obstruct anything. Now close it.

Hook the rigged wire to the tablet and xbox.

Use the ritual knife to get 5 ounces of your own blood. Put the blood in a jar or something.

Do the chant above.

Now slightly tap the blood with the tip of your knife as if you were sacrificing someone.

Drink your own blood.

Turn on the xbox and leap frog simultaneously.

Enjoy the experience if you have one.

If you do this, beware for this is an Illuminati ritual.

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