Theory: Half Life is Zelda

Hello ladies and gentlemen. Today, I am uncovering a startling discovery. What you see will change your life forever. It will be difficult for you to deny the following proof. You have been warned.

Half Life is a game, which was, released in 1998 by the game company Valve. Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time is also a game, released in 1998 by the game company Nintendo. Do you see the similarities yet? But that's not all.

Both games are in 3D, but so were many other games at the time, right? But have you noticed the protagonists? Gordon Freeman and Link, share the similar quality of being a silent? Now, listen to this. Half Life has won numerous game of the year awards, and has been called the best game ever made. Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time has won numerous game of the year awards, and has been called the best game ever made. If you are still not convinced yet, don't worry you will soon. I should have shown this at the beginning, but I feel I should save the best for last. Fest your eyes on this:

[Missing image: Theory- Half Life is Zelda.png]

Have you seen it yet? The Triforce from Ocarina of Time is on the rocket launcher from Half Life!

Now that I have proven myself, you may be asking: What does this all mean? I'll tell you what it means. Shigeru Miyamoto and Gabe Newell are the same person! Calm down I know what your think: How can they be the same person if they are so different from each other? The answer is simple to me because I already know it, but first we have to look at we got.

Shigeru: Japanese, Skinny, His Company Make Sequels Frequently, In The Home Console Industry, Created Zelda

Gabe: American, Fat, His Company Makes Squeals Sequels Less Frequently, In The PC Gaming Industry, Created Half Life

What do they share in common? They are responsible for creating a gaming company and making successful games

How can they be the same person then!?! Easy, spilt personalities. Shigeru Miyamoto and Gabe Newell is just one person with two different personalities which are opposite from each other. But it's not that simple you see? A regular person is not able to look like Shigeru one day and then look like Gabe the next day. No amount of makeup and suits will give anybody the ability to look like both of these people. This is going to scare you, but the only thing that can do this is... a shape shifting lizard person.

Many people rumoured that shape shifting lizard people exist, but here's your proof. But why would this lizard person (who from now on we are going to call Gabe Miyamoto) would do this. Here's why. Gabe Miyamoto was tired being Shigeru Miyamoto so he decided to assume the role of Gabe Newell so he could make more money by making another smash hit, Half Life. Both Nintendo and Valve have a ton of money, and one day Gabe Miyamoto will use all his combined cash to start his own private army. Using his private army, he will enslave mankind and soon his lizard people will take over planet Earth.

We cannot let this happen. But, this is still a theory. A strong theory needless, but still a theory. Meaning that nothing here means anything until we get the final nail in the coffin. This is what I ask of you viewers. I need you to ask either "Shigeru Miyamoto" or "Gabe Newell" to be seen in the same room with each other. If both say no, then that means that they are unable to stand together because they are the same person and also a lizard! I haven't seen a picture of both of them in the same room before, so unless I see it, then I rest my case.

Comments • 0

Loading comments...