Unhappy Mask Salesman

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Recently, I had bought a red 3DS for $180.00. Looking for cheap games, I went to a garage sale. As I went to the garage sale, I saw a depressed middle aged woman, with her hands buried on her face, sobbing softly. I checked out their items, and saw an Ocarina of Time 3D game. I asked what the price was, and she said it was for free. I received it, then I headed home. Before I left, I heard the woman sobbing about a "son" and "the game".

I plopped down on the couch, and opened the game. It went to the title screen, and I selected New Game. For some reason, it would not create a new one. Instead, it loaded a profile called *EMPTY*. It loaded, and went to the opening cutscene. It showed Link just standing in one place, with an emotionless face. The camera panned down, showing Zelda's rotting corpse on the ground, filled with realistic maggots and flies. The cutscene ended, and Link was now controllable. The game randomly selected the Ocarina, and played the Song of Storms, and the game glitched up.

It showed the Happy Mask Salesman next to Link even though he wasn't even in the game! The Salesman pulled out a mask, and what it was still haunts me to this day. It was the skull kid's severed head, with the mask still attached. As soon as he pulled the mask off, the game froze for ten minutes, and Loaded another profile, named SORRYFORIT. The other profile was name HELL, and the game randomly chose HELL. It loaded the save, and Link was on Lon Lon Ranch. His horse was lying on the ground, and just in the same pose as Zelda, and rotting, too. I tried to exit, but a subtitle kept popping up, saying "There's no leaving Hell."

The Game controlled Link, and went over to the owner of the Ranch, and Link shot him with an arrow, right into his neck. Blood was spurting everywhere. The Happy Mask Salesman's laugh came up in the background, long with a distorted Song of Healing. It was so warped, high pitched, and low that you could barely tell it was the Song of Healing. The game started showing corpses everywhere, and showed Link committing suicide by slashing his wrists with his sword. The 3DS turned off, and would not even turn back on. Scared to death, I couldn't sleep.

At 12:30, the 3DS started making a low humming noise, which gradually got louder. The game cartridge shot out of the 3DS, and just VANISHED into thin air! My 3DS kicked the bucket, and I never saw the cartridge again.

If you ever come across a used game that's not by Gamestop, DON'T buy it, or face the same consequences I did.

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