User:Hyper-Realistic Mayonaise

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[[File:A great big jesus that lives in the sea.jpg|thumb|220px|right|"I'm a great big Jesus that lives in the sea!"

-Razorteeth, In Search of the Fucking Titanic]]

I am just a sentient jar of mayonaise. Nothing suspicious here...  Kewpie "Miracle Whip" Hellmann 14:45, August 6, 2018 (UTC)

The crap that I wrote

• Zoidberg's Suicide
• JackJack Anti-Skeleton Man the Killer
• PokeMan: Licked Dandelion.exe
• Hyper-Realistic Mayonaise's Two-Sentence Horror Story Compilation
• Mountain Dew: Colorless Rainbow
• How to Summon Colonel Sanders
• The Why the Hell Would You Play This Game Game