Whatreligionistrue.exe
DISCLAIMER: THE EVENTS DEPICTED IN THE FOLLOWING STORY ALL HAPPENED. THE UNFORTUNATE VICTIM OF "whatreligionistrue.exe" IS UNFORTUNATELY SUFFERING FROM UNKNOWN CASES OF SHITBRAIN DISEASE AND LEPROSY. NOT EVEN JESUS CHRIST HIMSELF CAN HEAL HIM OF HIS SUFFERING. PROCEED WITH CAUTION.
The Old Testament - Genesis, Chapter 1.
In the beginning, God created the universe. He then created light. God saw the light, and the light was good. He separated the light from the dark. This has lead many to believe that God is racist.
More days go by, and the first human is created. Then, he gets his rib removed and that rib turns into woman. God called the man Adam, and the woman Eve. Long story short, Adam ends up giving it to Eve up the bum, and then they have two twins, Cain and Abel, but that's not important.
Many people believe that God created everything in 7 days, but unfortunately, after years of research, we have come to the decision that this theory is not true. God actually created the world in 8 days. What did he create on the 8th day? An executable file called "ifjesusisfromthemiddleeastwhyishewhite.exe". The file, to this day, has been the most difficult file to find on the face of the internet.
Luckily, a group of expert computer hackers managed to find the legendary file on dropbox.com. This find was unbelievable, and caused the hackers a great deal of fame. Yes, you guessed right. The hackers where in fact Lizard Squad.
Now, going back to the Qur'an. If you look at Matthew 57:69, a large article about how the file was made and what it contains. Many Holy books have had many of their sacred people talk about what this file is about, but we can only know who is telling the truth by opening it. So that is what one of the hackers did, and this is what happened...
The file is approximately 7MB in size. When clicked, your computer will restart and boot back into the BIOS because the file removed your OS. On your BIOS, you need to go to boot and select boot from disk and then restart. When computer computer has successfully restarted, you will be asked a series of questions. Make sure to have a bible at hand, for the questions are all about Matthew 57:69. After all questions are answered, all of the electricity in your house will turn off. When this happens DO NOT UNPLUG YOUR COMPUTER AT ALL COSTS. If you do the earths core will stop spinning and then an earthquake of a magnitude of 1000 on the Richter Scale will hit earth. You then need to type JESUSisMAboi in the keyboard. After this has happened, you may proceed installation of the file.
When your computer boots, a Windows screen will prompt. DO NOT BE FOOLED. THIS IS NOT LEGIT WINDOWS. THIS IS WINDOWS JESUS EDITION AND IT IS INFESTED WITH VIRUSES AND SATAN. Anyway, after you enter your password, you want to click on any file on the desktop. This will install a file called whatreligionistrue.exe. This file takes around 6 hours to install. After installation, click on the file.
Before I tell you what happened, I want to show you what some people had to say about what they witnessed after enabling the file.
"I couldn't believe my eyes. I have finally been told the truth"
"Wow. Just wow. When I downloaded this from Softonic, I never thought it would actually be the real deal"
"I got a weird case of Leprosy after viewing this. I thought Jesus could heal that but obviously not smh"
"I talk to my friend Jimmy about what I saw when I opened this file. He's always with my in my head and I can actually hear him too. It's all good"
You may not be prepared for what I'm about to tell you, but here goes.
The file displays a text box, with the single words-
"all religion was invented by rick sanchez ffs how can u be that dumb of a shit smh"
EPILOGUE
THE AUTHOR OF THIS HORRIFYING STORY IS NOW DEAD BECAUSE THE JESUS GANG KILLED HIM AMEN.
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