WordWorld: Duck Goes on a Rampage

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Hurrah! I'm the first being here to make a WordWorld related page. Please don't prove me wrong, and let's get on with the story.



Intro

Hi there. I go by the name, Bartholomew. Yeah, let's go with that. Now, have you heard of the PBS Kids show, WordWorld? It ran for 3 seasons from 2007 to 2011, and the 3rd season is CRIMINALLY SHORT, they could've added like, 9 more episodes to it. Anyways, the main premise is that the characters live on the titular WordWorld, and they are made of the letters in their name. For instance, Dog is made of the letters D, "head" O, "torso" and G "bottom". They can also build words with letters to solve their problems.

Now, what if I told you that there was a lost episode of WordWorld. You probably wouldn't believe me, but I saw it. And I'll detail it to you readers right now.

How I Came Across It

I was invited to visit the PBS Kids studio for a tour. At one point during the tour, they let us walk around to look at stuff on our own. In regards to me, I came across a bucket with a bunch of DVDs. What caught my eye was a copy of a WordWorld DVD.

This DVD to be exact.
This DVD to be exact.

I picked it up, but underneath, there was another DVD. It looked like a blank disc but it had this written on it in black sharpie.

WORDWORLD LOST EPISODE
DUCK GOES ON A RAMPAGE
DO NOT WATCH

I picked up the DVD, but as soon as I did, they called us back to continue the tour. So I hid the DVDs I got.

When I got home, I was intrigued about what could be on that DVD. So I put it into my DVD player, and said "I have to clean my VCR". What does that line serve to the plot? Mr. Krabs: Nothing!

The Episode

I'll post a transcript of the episode, but before I do that, let me point out some details.

  1. The theme song was normal. Because what supernatural spirit or deranged Dan Danko & Tom K. Mason (two of the writers for WordWorld) would ruin the wonderful work that Billy Straus has done?

AND THAT'S THE END OF THE LIST!

The title card did in fact say "Duck Goes on a Rampage" as the kids who normally narrate over the titles for the episode said that title. Anyways, here's the transcript.

Narrator: It's another beautiful day in WordWorld. Now, let's see what Duck is up to.
Duck: Perfect.
Narrator: Hey Duck. What are you doing right now?
Duck: Uh, it's a secret.
Narrator: Okay. But give us at least a little hint of what you're doing.
Duck: It's none of your business!
Narrator: O-okay Duck. I'll narrate over someone else's happenings.
Duck: Yes. Please do.

I was worried. What was Duck planning on doing?

Duck: Now that I have finished my plan, I will do what everyone does with a plan. Deploy it! (maniacal laughter) Quack. (more maniacal laughter)

Now I'm wondering, "Why is he laughing like that? Is he, evil?" Because of that, I became strangely invested.

Frog: Hey Duck, my best pal!
Duck: Uh, hey Frog!
Frog: Duck, what's wrong?
Duck: Oh nothing. Nothing's wrong. But, I have to go, uh, find something.
Duck runs off to a room with a bunch of letters.
Duck: Now time to get started. K. N. I. F. E.
The letters create a knife.
Duck: Knife! Now to show it to Frog.
Frog: Where is Duck? It's been a while.
Duck: Hey Frog!
Frog: Duck?
Duck slowly approaches Frog.
Frog: What are you doing with that, KNIFE!? How'd you get ahold of a knife!?
Duck: I built it. And I'll unbuild you!

I then saw Frog being dismantled solely by the knife prying his letter F head off his body. His hyper-realistic letters hit the floor. I was so horrified. Why would Duck, dismantle, his, pal Frog? All I know is that blood wouldn't work in this story, they're made of letters. Anyways, I continued watching. Duck walked out of, the location he and Frog were in, I don't know. I didn't specify where they were. ANYWAYS!!

Narrator: Duck is taking a visit to Pig's barn, where he's filming an episode of his cooking show.
Pig: And that's how we cook the perfect pizza!
Ant: Pig, I still don't think you should've added the pepperoni.
Pig: Don't worry Ant. We're made of letters, you know.
Ant: Oh yeah.
Duck: Hey Pig! Ant!
Pig/Ant: What's up, Duck?
Duck: I would appreciate it if you provided me with some letters so I can build something.
Pig: Okay Duck. Here's 2 of each letter in the alphabet.
Duck: Thanks. Just what I need.
Duck then gives Pig the knife he had.
Duck: You can use this knife I, made for you! Yeah. It's a gift from me. That I gave to you. So you can cook.
Pig: Aw, thanks Duck.
Duck runs outside with the letters.
Ant: Hmm.
Pig: What's wrong, Ant?
Ant: I feel a little suspicious of Duck. He seems... off.

I was quivering. I've seen this show before, and Pig & Ant were my favorite characters. What was Duck planning on doing to them?

Duck: Now that I've got the letters, it's time to, build a word!
The "Build A Word" song starts playing.
Duck: (singing) It's time to build a word. Let's build it. Let's build it now!
Duck: G. U. I. L. L. O. T. I. N. E.
Duck puts the letters together to build the word.
Duck: Guillotine!
Duck: (singing) Yeah we just built a word! We built it! We built it!
Duck: Oh Pig! Oh Ant!
Pig and Ant walk outside because Duck called them.
Pig/Ant: Yes Duck!
Duck pushes Pig into the guillotine.
Ant: I knew something was up with you! What are your motives!?
Duck picks up Ant and pulls him apart, separating him into 3 letters spelling "Ant".
Duck: Now time for some more precious, precious letters.
Duck pulls the string for the guillotine, lowering the blade in an instant, dismantling Pig into his 3 letters.
Duck: And without any motive!
Narrator: So now we know that Duck is a serial dismantler, as he pulled his WordFriends apart. The End.
iris out

The credits started playing. I was upset at the sights of the episode, but confused by the ending. Why didn't Duck have a motive? Why did the narrator narrate over the end even though at the beginning, he didn't even know what Duck was doing in the first place? What was that last one? I donated the disc to an archivist that rips obscure DVDs. But I then got an email saying that for some reason, he was so disturbed, that he destroyed the disc. I said "Great, now we have a piece of lost media on our hands". I then hung up immediately.

Aftermath

Because of my disturbance from that episode, I haven't watched an episode of WordWorld in months. Only recently, have I watched that "Rocket to the Moon" DVD. But I still fear that some day, Duck will find me. And that he'll dismantle, or in my case, kill me, like he did to his WordFriends.



Written by Mr. Mike T. McBaxter
Content is available under CC BY-SA

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