Came in front of interviewer (Copypasta)

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As a confidence technique on job interviews I find out who will be interviewing me, I find a picture of them online, I print it, and I masturbate onto the picture. I know it sounds silly but it gives me a psychological boost of sorts. During the interview I keep thinking of what I did to their image, and it is kind of hard to be intimidated by somebody if you came all over them a few minutes ago.

Male or female interviewer it doesn't matter, it's not necessarily sexual it's a dominance thing.

Well I really screwed up recently. I was in the office bathroom a few minutes prior to my interview, doing my technique, and I somehow don't hear the bathroom door open. So somebody is in there, and they surely hear me masturbating. I walk out and I am horrified to see a person at the sink turn around and stare at me. Then I saw him look horrified. He was looking at what was in my hands. It was a picture of him, covered in semen. He was the guy who was going to interview me.

I just dropped the picture and literally ran out. I didn't bother trying to do the interview.

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