Dictionary 2: The Lost Book
One day my mother kicked me out of the house for playing too much Newgrounds and using 4Chan and not doing anything productive. (This story takes place sometime in the 2000s if you couldn't tell, dumb ass.) So anyways, there I was, forced to find something else to do with my day. I decided to go to the library to see if the latest books were there. When I got to the front desk the librarian talked my ear off about new releases. The latest Harry Potter, Twilight, and other stuff that I believe came out during that time and was moderately successful. Don't like it? why don't you write the story instead? Anyways, she kept droning on and on until something caught my ear. "What did you say?" I asked her. "Diary of A Wimpy Kid?" She said in her nasally voice. "No, the one before it." I said, getting pretty bored of this shit. "Dictionary 2?" She asked, her voice getting low, like a whisper. Why did it get so low? It was like she was telling me some dark secret. "What's that supposed to be?" I asked, laughing at the asinine idea of a second dictionary. "It's a book I cannot give to you because of how dark it is." I scoffed at her. "What do you mean I can't read it? It's just a dictionary." "Whatever you say, kid." She said, her eyes getting pretty wide. She handed me the book and I checked out. It was a pretty big book, hard to believe they found enough words to put into a supposed second dictionary. I didn't bother opening it until I got home, and then I was pretty tired. I tossed the book on top my dresser and took a nap, forgetting about the book for a few days.
When I finally picked up the book four days later I had almost completely forgotten checking it out. I sat on my bed and cracked it open, expecting just a second dictionary, whatever that's supposed to be. When I saw the first page my skin went as pale as the pages. My name was the only word on the first page. I screamed. I flipped through the book and looked at all the pages. There were just random words. It didn't mean anything. I flipped to the first page again. It was actually just a word that resembled my name sorta. "What a stupid book" I said under my breath. I started looking at the second page. There wasn't a pattern to the words other than the alphabetic order. But what were these words? They didn't make any sense. 'Achadidksdl' was one fairly early on. The definitions were done in these words as well. Nothing made sense. I went onto my computer and typed in a different word, 'accjhewsjdf'. It didn't need to be auto corrected? what the fuck? There were so many words too. A few were short like 'Cdids', and some were long like 'efijisfjdjfkfkjfefjksfkslslzdkjaljadlwkdzaldmdajlod;kmaoldjowojddjmdpawdm,damwdd;lawdmd.dmawdlwdwpodjawodawodladmndondawwnohdwd'. Some were downright strange like 'hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh', and 'm.];.,];[,;;].'. Like, what the fuck? It seemed to be another language or something.
Suddenly my mom was shaking me awake. I must've passed out from exhaustion. I saw the book next to me in bed. 'Revised Dictionary'. What? My mom was shouting about how I'm not allowed near her paint cans anymore and how I went into the library the other day acting like a lunatic and that the shit I took on the librarians desk got me banned permanently. I thought back and remembered that before I went to the library I huffed paint because that's what I usually do when my mom kicks me out.
Written by Bloom
Content is available under CC BY-SA
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