Garfield.wmv
While I was on Deviantart, I found this total Sonic.exe clone. I wanted to upload it here since it's that horrible.
I'm a total Garfield fan much like everyone else, I like the newer strips, but I don't mind reading the classic strips. I don't think I've ever bought weird things like bootleg games though I don't think I want to do it again after the experience I had...
It was a nice summer afternoon, I was at a flea market, after being dragged there by mom. After scanning the shelves of DVDs, I saw something on the edge of one shelf. It was a USB labeled "Garfield.wmv" in black marker, on it was a picture of Garfield. Though, his face was completely black, except for two glowing red dots and a mouth full of fangs. His eyes were staring directly at me. I got a little spooked, then decided to buy it, heck, it might be more porn.
As I brought it to the counter, I saw a face of pure terror on the employee's face. "Hey, dude, something wrong?" I asked him. He fully regained consciousness, then looked at me with a stern face and said, "No, it's just...I saw that face on the USB before", and grabbed it out of my hand for further inspection. "Oh yeah, my son loved Garfield" he chuckled as I facepalmed, idiot I thought. I decided to show this strange-ass USB to my friend Luke since stuff like this usually scared him.
Before I did, I decided to play it. After jamming it into my poor PC, it started up with the intro for The Garfield Show. All of a sudden, Garfield, with the same black face, ran into Odie. It froze for 5 seconds, before going on a blue screen. And then I was like "Fuck!", because I just got this computer yesterday, and now it was ruined. It showed a title screen for Garfield: Caught in the Act. I was pretty happy because I got a free game inside a normal The Garfield Show DVD since I hated The Garfield Show anyways. The first thing I noticed that was out of place was when I pressed start, there's was a split second when I saw the title image turned into something much different, something that I now consider horrifying, before cutting to black.
I remember what the image looked like in that split second before the game cut to black; The normal purple background had darkened, the words "GARFIELD" were rusted and ruined, the SEGA 1995 and PAWS 1995 were now instead GOD 666, and the background characters were hanged with a noose.
But the freakiest thing that was in that split second frame was Garfield, his face was completely black and bleeding with two glowing red dots staring RIGHT AT ME, and his teeth were now fangs. I was rather disturbed by that image when I saw it though I figured that it was just a glitch and forgot about it. After it cut to black it stayed like that for about 10 seconds or so. And then another weird thing happened, the save file select from Sonic the Hedgehog 3 popped up, and I was like "WTF? What is this doing in a Garfield Game for crying out loud!", anyway, then I notice something off, the background was the Creepy Steven from The Sophia Show episode, "Me Cupcake, You Cupcake", and there were only one save file with the other ones locked with the lock symbol. The music was that creepy Rainbow Factory music, only it was extended and seemed to have been in reverse. And the image for the save file where you see a preview of the level you're on is just red static for all three files.
What freaked me out more was the character select, it showed only John (who was holding a letch with Odie attached to it), Buhdeuce and Alexa and to my surprise, Hacker, Plankton, Oonski the Great, and Bad Apple from the Apple Jacks commercials! Now I was sure that something was up, I mean, how can you play those villains in a Garfield game.
That's when I realized that this wasn't a glitchy game, it was a hacked game.
Yeah it definitely looked hacked, it was really creepy, but as a smart gamer, I wasn't scared (or at least I tried not to be), I told myself that it was just a hacked game and there's nothing wrong with that. Anyways, shaking off the creeped out feeling I picked File 1 and chose John and Odie and when I selected and got started. The game froze for about 5 seconds and I heard a creepy pixelated laugh that sounded an awful lot like that Kefka guy from Final Fantasy before cutting to black.
The screen stayed black for about 10 seconds or more, then it showed a background of that creepy Garfield, with the words "TIME TO PLAY A GAME, LEVEL 666". The screen faded in and the level title vanished revealing John with Odie in the park from Hotspot the Dog, the music was different though, it sounded like a peaceful melody in reverse. Anyway, I started playing and had John walking Odie. What was odd was, that John began to speak to Odie.
"Hey Odie!" said John. Odie simply barked, as John stared at him. "We are gonna meet with Garfield at the park, behave your best!". John continued to walk Odie around the park, he noticed how empty the park was, and shrugged it off. Suddenly, I saw something and I stopped to see what it was; it was Tad (from the Talking Words Factory movie) lying dead on the ground bleeding (That was when the music started to slow down), John gasped, then Odie began to bark and whimper. I could feel their agony, seeing their best friend murdered was probably hard, anyways I shrugged it off and kept them walking.
After a minute passed after the music stopped, John and Odie stopped, it wasn't until I saw why; Garfield was there on the other side of the screen with his back to John and Odie with his eyes closed. "Oh there you are, Garfield" John chuckled. "Me and Odie were worried sick". Garfield turned around, showing he was wearing a mask to scare Odie. A screamer of Garfield with the mask that the creepy Sonic from Sonic CD appeared, as loud screaming could be heard, it was so loud, it almost made me go deaf.
Odie yelped, as John could be seen looking very mad. "Oh, Garfield, how could you!" he yelled. Garfield grabbed Odie, then grabbed the collar, and wrapped it around Odie's throat, suffocating him. "No, Garfield. You stupid asshole!" John yelled. Odie finally suffocated, falling to the floor with a blue pallet inside of the yellow pallet. As Garfield was attaching something sharp onto the chain, John screamed, again I felt sorry for John. "John," Garfield said faintly, as John uncovered his hands from his face.
The screen faded to black, with pixalated text reading:
"You made me do this. Don't you think, you deserve to die, not me. Think about it"
The screen faded back, John was now holding a shotgun to his head, Garfield was no where to be seen. He proceeded to press the trigger, as realstic brain matter splattered all over Odie's corspe. Garfield came back, his face was black like the title screen, as he drags Odie and John's corspes to a graveyard, burrying them.
I shook the shock off as I was brought back to the character select, the save file that had John with Odie was different; John and Odie were no longer in the box itself but in the TV screen itself, which was flickering with that red static, their expression scared me, their eyes were black and bleeding, Odie was also blue inside of his usual cheery yellow, John's blue shirt was now dark-red. The screen flashed static, showing red text:
"Good job, Nicolas. You now unlocked Alexa and Buhdeuce, but they'll soon be mine"
A pixelated-laugh sounded, it sounded like Kefka from Final Fantasy. It faded back, as some red mist circled the locked save file, revealing Alexa and Buhdeuce. This was strange, as I always coupled Alexa and Buhdeuce on Deviantart, never would I expect someone to make a game about it. Shrugging off the creeped out feeling, I picked the couple, as that laugh came up again.
The screen cut to black again and stayed there for another 10 seconds, this time the level said "Ah, what a couple. So sad to see them die, together". I was pretty pissed, whoever made this ROM hack wanted to mess with me.
The next level looked much different, it had the usual metal floor of the Rainbow Factory from the fanfic, "Rainbow Factory". Some fetuses were filling through pipes, after taking a closer look, I found out they were fillies like Apple Bloom and Sweet Belle. Buhdeuce was holding a picnic basket, and Alexa had a huge stomach, meaning she was preganant. I pressed the right arrow-key, as they started to move. After I passed the sixth tube, the screen flicked static. Just in a split second that creepy Garfield lunged at the couple right before the screen went black, there was a loud screeching noise that only lasted 5 seconds. Another screen of red text appeared, now stating:
"Aw, what a sweet baby. So sad, I have to power the pipes of the Rainbow Factory, as they use fetuses to do this nowadays"
Buhdeuce was the first to wake up, shaking his head. He noticed his butt was gone, as he tried to booty kick himself awake. Now in front, was Garfield, eating something red. Buhdeuce blinked, then noticed what it was.
"What?" Garfield asked. "Oh, this?" he held up another piece. "Well, while YOU were asleep, I got a little impatient and helped myself to a small sample. I got it from your big butt. I didn't know how taste butt-meat is, want some, bap?"
Without waiting for a response, Garfield shoved the strip of meat into the duck's mouth. Buhdeuce spit it out, onto Garfield's black-face. The demonic-feline grabbed Buhdeuce, as he began to pounce and beat him up. Alexa woke up, seeing Buhdeuce's head sliced into a stack, bleeding.
Suddenly Garfield appeared right behind Alexa in what appeared to be pixelated black smoke, I made Alexa turn and then punch Garfield, but Garfield vanished in black pixelated smoke before I could even land a hit, that terrible laugh went off again. Then Garfield appeared behind Alexa again and then I made her punch again, and Garfield vanished again laughing. Alexa was panicking even more, and even I felt like I was going crazy, Garfield was practically playing with us, he was playing a sick twisted little mind game with me and Knuckles...
Another cut scene played as Alexa fell to her knees and clutched her head sobbing, I felt her agony, Garfield was actually driving us BOTH crazy.
And then in a split second, Garfield ripped open Alexa's stomach. A fetus was shown, it cried, as Garfield ate it WHOLE. "Hmm, not bad. But I thought Buhdeuce's butt was deilous than this crap. I am gonna try apples and some beaver next" the cat said, as he vanished into smoke. That stupid text appeared, again taunting me with:
"See. Your couple is dead, I killed your precious Alexa. Unless Garfield gets his heart and soul from the dance floor, I will toy with ALL of your friends"
It said as that creepy laugh sounded again. I knew then and there, this Garfield wasn't Garfield at all, he was posing as him. "yOuR rIgHt nIcOlAs" said the text. It showed a cutscene, this really confused me. It showed Garfield, at a bar, beside him were Quigley, Nermal, and SwaySway.
"Yo' Garfield man!" said SwaySway. "Have you seen Buhdeuce, I can't find him anywhere". Garfield shrugged and nodded, he had previously seen him with his wife, Alexa. "I just called Rainbow Dash," said a voice from offscreen, revealing Venomous Snaptrap with an iPhone in his hands. "She said 'Oh, don't worry Snap. I'll find those cute couples!' and hung up. I am not a brony, but what does that mean". Garfield facepalmed, as he walked out of the bar, walking into Princess (from Harvey Beaks).
"And where do you think you're going," she said in her slutty voice. "Mr. WMV has strict rules, as stated in chapter 666, 'no cat or dog shall be leaving the bar'. So 'no' means NO!!!". The feline pushed her aside, walking out of the bar. Static filled the screen, as pictures of...that demonic Garfield flashed. Snaptrap screamed, running for his life. The demonic feline grabbing his neck, as he snapped it in two.
"I guess that why they call you 'Snaptrap', Snaptrap" he chuckled, throwing the body into the arms of Quigley. "Y..you mad man" sighed the rat, sobbing as hot tears rolled down his face. "Ga...Garfield will get you for-" but before he could continue, Garfield grabbed his neck and slammed him against the floor, snapping his body in two as blood sprayed furiously. As Garfield turned his head to SwaySway, SwaySway hopped into the rocket van, flying off, bursting dust into the demonic feline's face.
Garfield got into a flying pose, as he lifted off into the air. The game began to play Sonic 4: Episode 2's Metal Sonic boss music, I was now in control of SwaySway's rocket van. It was the typic Metal boss fight, except with Garfield. He would usually fire beams at SwaySway, dangerously injuring the rocket van. I really wanted to kill this evil, demonic Garfield for killing Alexa and Buhdeuce, so I tried with all my might to beat this. When Garfield fired the last beam, almost ending SwaySway, a familiar figure fired back with force at Garfield.
"Good morning!" said a cheerfully, dumb voice. It was Uncle Grandpa! I was so happy, not only was I now safe, but I could play as my favorite character. Uncle G had the usual controls, he could fire laser beams from his eyes, which would take a lot of damage on Garfield. The demonic cat took his last hit, as SwaySway and Uncle G fist pounded.
"Now let's see how this creep really is," said SwaySway. Uncle G and SwaySway began to walk towards Garfield's body, though, something was up. I felt that SwaySway and Uncle G were in danger and something bad was going to happen. I heard faint static growing louder as SwaySway and Uncle G were but inches away from Garfield and stopped. SwaySway stuck his hand out to touch him. That foreboding feeling in my gut was growing stronger and I felt the urge to tell SwaySway to get away from Garfield as the static grew louder.
Then, in a split second, Garfield got up. His eyes fixed on Uncle Grandpa, though, there wasn't a smile. Just in a split second Garfield lunged at Uncle G right before the screen went black, there was a loud screeching noise that only lasted 5 seconds. That damned text appeared, reading this time as:
"You thought this was over, think again."
The screen faded back, and a horrible sight was on screen, blurring at my face. It was a still photo of Uncle Grandpa. His face was mangled and bloodied, one eye dangling over his upturned face, popped. He was naked down to his underwear, his stomach crudely cut open and his entrails laying beside him. Beside him was SwaySway, who was sobbing very loud, clutching his head.
"No, it can't end like this! I want Buhdeuce, I want my Uncle G back!" he said, as he cried furiously in pain of his loss. That damn cat appeared in front of SwaySway, now smiling. As SwaySway wanted to protest, Garfield grabbed SwaySway's neck and began to beat him furiously. The screen flicked with static, and on the fourth flicker, it showed the same red text:
"I NEVER DIE"
I clutched my fists tightly, as that damn laugh played over and over again. Maybe he was right, he'll never die. The screen faded back, SwaySway was nowhere to be seen, in his place was a blood splat with Garfield standing on top of it. He was chuckling, "Foolish human, I have more than one of me", a hedgehog appeared in front of him. This hedgehog was blue, about the same size as him, with bleeding black eyes.
It was...Sonic? No, this couldn't be Sonic. "He was once like me until I turned him into my kind," said the cat. He grabbed a bag, something was moving around in it and shoved it into a mirror. Outcome...SwaySway? But, something was up with SwaySway, his eyes were bleeding and black, his white shirt was now red, and his hair was black. The SwaySway chuckled, floating up into the air, and then flying away. This long cutscene was over, as it faded to a new level.
I was playing as SwaySway, he looked very upset, as tears were rolling down his face. I made him walk around, this staticy level of some sort. Then, a loud "AHH!!!" played, I recognized it as Rainbow Dash. What did those monsters do to her, anyways, I kept SwaySway walking. I ran into Alexa and Buhdeuce's corpses, both were mangled like Uncle G was. Then, I ran into Tails, his skin was grey instead of orange, and his tails were droopy and dead. Knuckles was beside, his red fur had darkened, and his knuckles were dripping with blood.
"Where am I?" asked the scared duck. Tails groaned and fell to the floor. So did Knuckles, I kept SwaySway walking. "I...I...I" said someone in the background. "...wanna go home" it continued. What kind of monster is responsible for this, a sign hanged above the staticy level from a tree branch, "PALS CLASSROOM", it read. Pals? You mean my classroom I go to, I mean, I never really liked the PALS classroom. But, I was always was suspicious of my teachers when they would go to another room.
SwaySway stopped. "I can't go on like this" he groaned, as he reached into his pocket. "I guess, I should end it" he continued, grabbing a gun in his hand. "It's been nice knowing ya, bap, you served us right" tears were streaming down his face, I felt like crying myself seeing my favorite characters in this state of agony. The screen faded to black, with a victory jingle playing, as I heard a gunshot with a blood splatter played with it. The jingle continued, getting more corrupted as it went on.
Uncle G woke up, he was covered in cuts and bruises. "Huh?" he said in confusion. Garfield stood beside the hospital bed he was in, crying. "You're...awake?" said Garfield sighing in relief. This was the Garfield I knew, not the demonic demon that I now knew. The lasanga-eating cat explained to Uncle G that they must hide from a "monster", then Uncle Grandpa agreed. It showed the two running to a house, that I recognized as John's house. Another cutscene played, showing Hacker, Plankton, Oonski, and Bad Apple walking. They seemed to walk in the same direction as Garfield and Uncle Grandpa, all talking about evil plans.
Garfield and Uncle G ran into them, apologizing. Then told the villains to hide with them, Garfield was unsure of this idea but agreed with Uncle Grandpa. The cutscene ended, I got to play as the group. I could also switch between them. I played as Bad Apple since he was my favorite. A text bubble appeared, reading "I need to find Cinnamon, he'll surely help us", as I pressed "OK" and went on walking. Just then, Captain Smek appeared and bumped into the group. Smek asked them where they were going, and they replied with "Hide, or else!", Smek went along with it and joined.
I was finally done with this long level, reaching the house. But then, Sonic appeared in front of them, grabbing Hacker by the neck, snapping it. The Hacker fell to the floor, bleeding furiously in pain. Smek offered to help, but Garfield and the rest ran into the house, with Smek joining along in fear. SwaySway appeared, in his monster-form, and grabbed Uncle G's neck and snapped it. The group ended up the same, except for Smek, who said to the monsters that he'll join them to live. The two grabbed Smek, forcing him into the mirror, out came an eviler version of Smek, not that he wasn't already evil.
It was over, the evil had won over my group. All hope was lost, as the screen faded to black, with text appearing:
"It's over. I killed Garfield. Smek is on our side now!"
The laugh sounded, as it came back to the static level, I was now in control of Rainbow Dash. RD could do a sonic rainboom, and stuff like that. Although, she didn't last long, getting too disturbed by the corpses of former cartoons, and ended up sonic rainbooming herself to death with her skull being cracked.
It became staticy again, showing the rest of the intro of The Garfield Show. Odie was now lying in a pool of his own blood, Garfield was standing over his body, smiling. The dog's body was blue, drooling purple liquids from his mouth. John was hanged by a noose, swinging back and fourth, with a bloody hole in his head, still dripping with blood. The intro ended, but instead of "THE GARFIELD SHOW", it read "I AM GOD" in bold font.
"You are not so tough, are you?" a voice said, as I looked behind me. It was Garfield, SwaySway, and Smek. Goodbye my good friend, thanks for rea30329ej239d2jd39dj2jd92jd29dj239jd239jd9j9dj29d2
—
Hello, I am Garfield. I will visiting you soon, stay still and don't make a peep. Oh, and if you're wondering what I did to Nicky, I turned him into one of my slaves. I bid you farewell, so go to sleep, and get ready for ME.
- Garfield
PS: I know one of you is a cute little girl named Tina, I'll go easy on you with my claws.
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