John Arbuckle Meets John Riccitiello
Hello guys. I'm the guy called John Arbuckle. I'm the owner of the cat called Garfield from the Garfield series. One time, I was browsing the internet for 10 seconds and then I saw some bad news. Oh crap! It's going to scare you, considering how awesome I am! It's going to scare you, considering how awesome I am! It's going to scare you, considering how awesome I am! It's going to scare you, considering how awesome I am! It's going to scare you, considering how awesome I am! It's going to scare you, considering how awesome I am! It's going to scare you, considering how awesome I am! It's going to scare you, considering how awesome I am! It's going to scare you, considering how awesome I am! It's going to scare you, considering how awesome I am! Don't go any further!
Unity actually planned to charge fees for every time a game is installed, with little attention to whether it should be charaged, such as reinstallations or pirated copies! Oh crap! Fuck! Shit! It's so scary, considering how awesome I am!
I then started crying for 30 seconds because my favorite Unity developers might go bankrupt just because of greed! Garfield had started getting nightmares, about the runtime fee announcement, that he was happy to wake up from! That poor cat... Then, someone knocked at my door for 5 seconds. I opened it after 10 seconds, and his name was John Riccitiello.
He then admitted (for 10 seconds) to being the greedy CEO of Unity Technologies that made the company plan the runtime fee policy in the first place! I was scared shitless, as not only does he have lots of power over Unity, but his name was JOHN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Garfield started to get worse NIGHTMARES!!!!!!!!!!!!
I then slapped his face for a second, went back to my bedroom 5 seconds after the slap, and started crying for 60 seconds. I then committed suicide due to the absolute shame of having the same first name as an asshole.
Whatever you do, don't be called John and open the door on a greedy CEO of Unity Technologies also called John, or else the same thing will happen to you for at least 1 minute and 56 sec- Y̴͍̯̮̺̳̳̽̔̄̇̍̈́̄̏̂̒͜ͅÓ̴̞̺̩̘͓̈́́̅̍͜U̷͕̩͊̄̈̃R̴̘̥͕͎̦̳̫̖̳̅̈̐̌͊́̉̐̌͜Ê̸̘̩̓̽̇̏̈͊̃̐͐͆̕͝͝ ̶̢͎̤͎̗̞̲̻̫̳̱̻̘͛͑͐̾̓̄̇͘͜N̸̡͚̜̩̺̖̦̟̥̖̮̯̭͉͎̅͑Ë̴̬̊̊̈́̆̈́͘X̴̬͉̟̲̼̝̑̿̂̂T̴̡̨͙̻̘̗̣̰̟͚͂̀̇
Á̷̛̼̩͖̺̦̬͌̊͛͌̑͛̇̕̚N̷̢͍̟̓̀͆̕͠͝D̵͙̼̥̅͛̒̐̀̀̋͂͂̾̐͊͠ ̶̢̨̪̲̠̽̏̑̊́̀T̷̖͊͛͛H̷̡͎̦͔͚̘͔͓̱̼̮̀͗͗͛͌͝Ẻ̷̪̟̖̏͛̋̓̇̇̋̀N̵̜͔̗͍̻̣͉̺͚̹̜̪̲͇͐̽͑́̽͛̑̂̚̚ͅ ̸̡͍͉̭̲͙̙͎͎͙͖̗̿̾̄͋͗̋ͅͅĄ̸̨͎̙͔͈̫͕̅̏̈́͑͋̔̎̐͘ ̵̧͉͉̱̠̰̦̻͖͔͎̞̩̇̏̏̕S̴̞͕̳̞̣̖͗͑̑́̐̕Ḳ̵̛̤̪͓̰̱̯̀̅̊͑̏̑̍͑͛̾̍̕̚E̷̺̔͑̃̂̎͘ͅĹ̶̫̪͂̃E̶̢̟̺̮̪͉͗̈́̆͒́T̷̢͕̞̽̓͐̍͋̀̈́̒̿̑̎̃̇̎̓Ő̸̡͔̠͕̘͙̲̪͇̱̭͕̽͆̈́̽͋̋͝ͅN̷̹̳̬̰̲̏̇͂̾̒̚ ̷̺̰͔͈̖͈̻̖̜͍̻̮̥̦̀́̌̅͘͝͠P̴̡̡͍̲̳̻̆͑̎̅͗Ớ̴͙͚̖̈́͌̉͑͂̓̍͗̆̓̆̈́͘P̷̧̢̯̼̜̫̣͈̟̳̪̒ͅP̸̬̹̮͓̟̙̮̤͍̲̥̔̽̓͛́͂̎̏̆͘͘͠E̶̢̨̡͎̜̦̩̺͎̼̫̐͑͊͛D̴̮͓͛͋́́̿͐̔̒͆͝ ̸̧̡̛̛͇̦̬̱̭̖̙͔͔̓̌̆̌̌̈́̅̒͑͘͘͝͝O̸̙͍̤̜̤̯͉͙̼̓͛̈̓͂̋͂͆̽͌͋̚͝Ư̴͈̻̳͎̱̙̔̀̄͌͋͗̒̒̓͆̅T̸̡̨̗̗̥͚̩̼̳̉̅͠
Written by ExplodingCreeper14
Content is available under CC BY-SA
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