PaRappa the Rapper 2: The Used Copy
OK. Umm. So. Uhh. This truly truly truly truly truly truly truly totally truly truly totally true terrifying and true story is a very very very hundred trilion billion zillion million billion zillion hundred thousand million billion thousand million hundred billion million trillion billion eighteen million billion trillion thousand billion trillion zillion billion zillion trillion thousand hundred thousand percent true! With that being said, let us begin.
Ahh... Nostalgia...!
The best feeling in the entire world. Isn't it?
Anyways, let us start and begim. Yes. Let us go.
Hi, I'm Bruce. And I'm 27 years old.
I love videogames, and that's a fact.
My favourite videogame growing up was Parappa The Rapper 2. For the PS2.
The feeling of mashing buttons and being so good at the game. Ahh, those times still stick with me now...
Today, I shall share a exprience that happened about two months ago. A exprience with a certain videogame. What was that videogame? Well, it was Parappa The Rapper 2 for the PS2.
I live in the north of Coverntry. Since, well, I'm British. I tried to get my hands on a PAL Version of the game.
I may have struck gold.
But, I wasn't looking for just a PAL Version. I was looking for a used copy.
Why? I don't know.
I looked on the GAME website first. There were no copies. They have been sold out.
That made me a little heated. So, I tried to go on EBay.
No scaplers had any copies. The copies that were sold were illegal copies. Ported from unknown regions.
So, I didn't decide to buy them.
I tried to think of another website. I was thinking ASDA. And, well.
Heh. They were sold out. Wow! This was not OK.
So, I decided to go on Amazon. Just to look at cheaper prices. I searched up what I wanted in the search bar. I pressed Enter.
I saw it. A decent copy of PaRappa The Rapper 2 for the PS2.
It looked new. So, I looked at the price. The product that was listed stated that it was a used copy. And it was the PAL Version. So, I was in luck.
The price was a bit, odd.
The price was around £1.00. I thought that it was a sale item? I think?
I thought it was gonna be about £20.00 - £25.00. But, I was wrong.
However, I had to click Buy. So, my cursor. It edged ever-so slightly closer to the big shiny and yellow Buy button.
I clicked it. A message appeared.
'Thank you for purchasing this item. It will be delivered to your home address within the next 2 to 3 months.'
I was so happy. But, I had to wait. The truth is, I hate waiting!
After 2.5 months, it arrived. To my home address, of course.
I took the package in. On the box was the return address and my home address and full name. Along with the name of the actual product. This is the name of the product:
'PaRappa The Rapper 2 PS2 (USED COPY)'
However, it was written in black sharpie. Did a child write it?
So, without any further questions, I opened the package. I had to throw out the packing puff thingys first.
A glow was coming from inside. I grabbed ahold of the game. I saw it.
It was the PAL Version of PaRappa The Rapper 2. It finally came!
I was glad.
The boxart looked slightly off. But, I didn't notice anything too major.
I had a PS2. It was up in the attic.
I threw the package into the recycling bin. I looked at the disc. It looked the same. However, the colours were a bit duller.
I rushed up to my attic.
I opened the attic door. I scurryed pass my other things.
I found my PS2, lying face-up in a box labelled this:
'Childhood Memories'
The other games were in. The Simpsons: Hit & Run, too. But, I grabbed the PS2.
I took it into the living room. I plonked it on the ground. I hit the griddy in excitement.
I stuttered. As I hooked the PS2 up to my TV.
I changed the channel. I turned on the PS2. I put the disc in. Then, it started.
The language selection screen for the game appeared. Only one language was there. English.
The rest of the languages were piles and piles of binary code. However, they weren't selectable. Only the English option was selectable.
I selected the English option.
The normal intro didn't play. It just went straight to the title screen.
The title screen seemed normal. I clicked the start button.
The normal DJ loading screen played. Then, it went to the world map, I guess.
I saw that Parappa was wearing the Yellow Hat.
I saw that the person who previously played that difficulty hasn't beaten a single level on Yellow Hat mode. The only level that was there was Stage 1.
I tried clicking on Stage One. It played as normal.
PaRappa then automatically ran to Stage 2. This was strange.
Stage 2 had minor glitches. The music in the level itself was backwards. But, it ended at Lesson 2.
Stage 3 was slightly normal. Except, PaRappa had red eyes.
Stage 4 was, normal.
Then, as Stage 4 was completed. The next Stage was opened up. Stage 5.
However, the music had stopped. And it felt, off.
The Stage started. The first line played as follows: 'Snip, snip, sni-'
However, there was now no funny message at the bottom anymore.
The music had stopped. Hairdresser Octopus seemed to have a grim expression on his face.
He started to, talk to me. This is what he said:
'You're in my world now, Bruce.'
I was so shocked. How did Hairdresser Octopus know my real name?
PaRappa started to talk, too. Here is what he said:
'Bruce, it's me, PaRappa. You weren't supposed to play this. This copy has secrets that the company doesn't want you to know about. Please, turn the game off now.'
However, I stood and watched on in disbelief. I thought it was a joke or a gag.
PaRappa then talked again. This is what he said:
'This is not a joke, Bruce. There is a malicious glitch inside of this copy. Inside of the code. You will pay for what you have done, Bruce.'
So, It wasn't a joke? Yeah. It wasn't a joke at all!
Now, I was scared.
Hairdresser Octopus looked angry. He said this:
'Turn the game off now!' Do not contiune playing this copy!'
Then, a bunch of binary appeared. It was quick. So, I didn't have time to translate all of it. But, this is what it meant in English:
'You're next, Bruce Jeffery Gray!'
How did the game know my full name?! I was so shocked!
Then, just when I thought it was over. It wasn't over.
Stage 6 loaded. The vocals were reversed and the beat was missing.
The subtitles read a tale about a boy named Max who died by stranglation (Via his PS2 Controller) due to him losing at Stage 8.
Stage 7 loaded. However, it never seemed to end.
It lasted for around 12 minutes.
Stage 8 loaded.
It was The Final Party.
However. It was now called The Final Part of Your Life.
It ended with PaRappa The Rapper jumping off the stage and dying.
A message appeared.
'Do what PaRappa did, because I can't believe anymore.'
This was sad to see. Then, my PS2 made a humming noise. It then crashed.
The PS2 switched off.
I turned it back on. Just to put the disc back into the case.
My TV now had this message burned into it:
'I am coming, Bruce.'
The disc had the same message on it. How?!
Then, I pulled the PS2 out. And I took it in the box back to the attic.
My knee hurted against the hard flooring. I had to put it back.
I put it back and I gave the game to the Police.
Just so they could do the work and not me.
Then, my life got much better. I still played games. The police burned that dammed game and I felt great.
They say that this story is true. Because it really is.
I never ever played any PaRappa The Rapper game ever again.
Written by TheBigLG
Content is available under CC BY-SA
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