San Andreas: The Bed, Bath, and Way BEYONd Storee.
Twice upon a time in a land not so far away, actually right across the street. I was in the mall trying to find shit to do to waste some time. I seen a bed bath and beyond, everything else had nothing of interest so I checked here, I regret it now... I walked in and the people just stared at
me like my face was.... UGLY! I was a little creeped the shit out so I just kept going though. I seen in the far end a duur with the letters above it written in BLUUD spelling "Beyond". I walked though the duur and there was a long aisle that
seemed to never end. Once I got to the end, I seen a homeless elf living in a tent, I woke him up and asked what this place was for. He woke up with a deep grin and just kept walking down the endless aisle. I got pissed so I kicked him in the ass and my fuut got stuck in his asshole, then BUUM. I was knocked out. I woke up to santa giving me a Playstation 2 with a free copy of san andreas. which I could not turn down due to the awesome times I had as a kid with this game, masterbating to the hUUkers in the car with cj. So I felt like I should thank him, so before I left, I tuuk a huge shat on his windshield outside on his crappy camry. When I got home, I connected the playstation and put in the copy of san andreas. So
mething felt off about it, but I didn't think much of it. Everything was a different contrast and everything was black and white. I just shrugged it off thinking of how it was free. I played though, but everyone seemed more hyper realistic than usual. Like this one time when I was playing the game, and it was all strange, like this one mission where I had to skydive off a building onto a GIANT white sheet. Once I landed on it, I started getting wrapped in it and it showed my character zuuming out to SNUUP dogg rolling a giant duuby with Miley Cyris and Bill Nye the science guy. Another was when sweet told me to go to this one house to sell some drugs, but when I got there the front duur wouldn't open so I shot it open and I was in the statue of happin
ess' insides, she was pregnant. I was like, DAfuuq and I shot the heart with a sniper like in Vice city with the muun and it started getting smaller, and then there was a note on the ground that say HELP with a dark figure drawn on it. Throughout the gameplay it hinted me to go to a certain place in the game where every fantasy of mine will come true. So I decided to go here, once I got here nothing happened. And then something happened. A guy in a wheelchair stuud up and cryed throwup out of his ass. And then his penis turned into a flame thrower, and he untimely decide he was going to kill me, he seemed invencible and I couldnt do anything so he killed me. When I woke up, I was back at my house on grove street, which is strange because usually you wake up at a hospital. So I walked out and bigfuut shot me and I died and mothman started eating cj's brain, it didn't turn to darkness for like 5 minutes and it just showed cj's body be con
stantly mutilated by this giant moth with a mans penis. Than BANG, and big screech came from the game and it showed an image of a mirror with bluudI3 letters written on it, "DON'T TURN AROUND" thinking to myself how stupid it was, I turned around to grab my Pepsi, but................... It.............................. was................................ a...............................Dr.Pepper and I cried for months, so when I turned back around cj had a Pepsi in his hand and he flicked me off with his other hand, so I was like ahhhhhh helllllz nah mutha fuckin shit dick and then I bitch smacked him and stole that damn pepsi out of his hands so he came out the tv and we got Into an argument and he tuuk off with his jetpack and a skeleton POPPED out the exhaust!!!!!!IIIIIII!IITTTT The end.
| Comments • 0 |
Loading comments...
|
