Simpsons Hit and Run: The Newspaper

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One of my favorite games ever has to be the Simpsons Hit and Run. The game has massive levels, so much to do, awesome missions, and so many references to the show I just had to like it! Unfortunately, I had sold my copy for the franchise the game rips off, Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas. And though I enjoyed it a lot, I couldn't help regret getting rid of a game that, in my eyes, surpassed Grand Theft Auto by a mile.

Luckily, a couple of days ago I stopped by my local GameStop to see what they had, and lo and behold, there it was! I almost instantly ripped it from the shelf, bought it, and ran back home as fast as I could. Before I knew it, my old Play Station 2 had been turned on, and the disk along with the tray disappeared into the console.

I watched the familiar title screen come up as I pressed start and began playing one of my all time favorite games and I jumped right in.

I walked up to Marge to get the usual impossible to lose first mission where I had to get ice cream and buzz cola from the Kwik-E-Mart. So I got in Homer's pink Sedan and drove off. Upon reaching the Kwik-E-Mart, I got out of the car and noticed something odd.

Right next to the Lard-Lad I could swear I saw police tape. I was about to go check it out when the game suddenly reminded me of my mission and forced me in the other direction. I decided I'd check it out after the mission. I went inside the Kwik-E-Mart and went to talk to Apu, who looked unusually pale.

Something even more weird happened upon me talking to him. I bought the usual items but, the mission didn't end right there, no. Instead, Apu offered me the newspaper to read. This never happened in the game, this shouldn't have happened in the game. Had I stumbled upon some rare Easter Egg? No, I would've surly heard about it on the internet, the game isn't that obscure, after all.

Never-the-less, I gladly excepted the newspaper from Apu and began reading.

The front page was that of the newspaper page you see in the loading screen of the first level, detailing how Homer ruined the local Hot Dog Eating Contest and was disqualified for vomiting. Then there was the small little article on the side that said how 90% percent of video games had annoying tutorial levels.

I then noticed that I had the option to flip through the newspaper. When I went to the next page, I was greeted with the loading screen of level two, then level three! I couldn't believe it, I had stumbled on some sort of hidden art gallery and may very well be the first player to find it!

Could barley contain my excitement as I flipped through the rest of it, level four, level five, level six, level seven.

It looked like I had made it to the end of the newspaper when I noticed something... strange.

On the bottom right corner of the screen the game had presented three options: X= next page, Square= previous page, and triangle= back to game. I expected the next option to no longer be available, yet it was.

There was another page of the newspaper. Curiosity got the better of me and I flipped to the next page.

I almost instantly dropped the controller out of shock.

"Local Man Jumps From Lard Lad Statue to His Death"

"Local Springfeilder Apu Nahasapeemapetilon was found dead at the scene after the manager of Lard Lad reported seeing someone jump of the Lard Lad statue to the police. He was pronounced dead at 3:35 PM. A suicide note was found on the counter of his store and read 'I have committed a horrific sin and betrayed Vishnu, not only have I robbed people of their hard-earned money unfairly, but when I was called out on it, I resorted to the petty act of murder. Maybe in my next life I can redeem my vile acts.' His victim was not identified in the note and police are still trying to track down who Nahasapeemapetilon had taken the life of."

When I got resumed the game I noticed Apu was no longer there and in his place on the counter was his suicide note.



Credited to Regularshowman
Originally uploaded on July 24, 2014

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