The Barn
In a quiet part of Ireland, a well of pitch black colour is hidden in a barn. The barn is completely surrounded by walls of tall Alder trees, so it is difficult to find. If you do find it, you will notice the paint of the barn is a muddy brown, chipped & peeling away. From the door hangs a padlock bigger than your hand and it chains the doors shut. If you walk toward the west wall of the barn at precisely 6:36 am on a Sunday, there will be words carved into the paint. These words are instructions. Most of the time the inscription has been described as being carved into the barn with scratches like that of human fingernails, other times like that of claws. The message on the barn should read something like: “If you seek the answer to your question, bring 3 silver coins of the currency of Denmark. The doors will shift when the new moon casts its shadow” You should arrive at midnight of the new moon with the 3 coins. As you navigate your way to the barn, turn off any flash lights or objects that supply light, walk in the direction of the padlocked doors & reach out. The doors will be gone & you should walk into the barn. You will hear the echoes of whining dogs through the barn; do not let it discourage you. You may turn your flash light back on & the noise will subside immediately.
In front of you should be the dark well. Its stone cover contains 3 thin slots; there is where you must place your coins. The stone will shift itself out of the way & with the noise of rusted gears turning, a platform is raised. Upon the platform is a man who looks cold, starved & pale. You may ask him any question you want, even for the secret of the universe & he will answer you truthfully. The man will quickly grab your flashlight & push you onto the platform while sprinting from the barn. The platform will lower itself back into the well quickly & the stone slides over back into place. At the bottom of the well, there emits a light from the water that rises to your waist, there is just enough light to enable you to see the walls around you. Upon them are the scratched answers to every question asked in the universe with the exception of the one you asked.
To your left are 3 empty coin slots.
I hope you brought spare change.
Originally uploaded on /x/ in 2007
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