The Eminem Brother Incident
I (M15) have been a fan of Eminem (M49) for a few years now. His storytelling, wordplay, punchlines, and overall lyricism are unmatched imo. And let's not forget his subpar rapping skills, I mean, the dude can spit so many syllables per second that it's literally insane (I'm not sure what subpar means but it sounds cool). He raps so fast, I swear, it's like he doesn't even need oxygen HAHAAHAHHAH I crack myself up lol.
Anyway, seeing as how Eminem is the best rapper alive, I get really mad when I see people hate on him, and my brother is no exception. But let's start at the beginning. So I was in my room vibing to Eminem's song from that new Venom movie with my speakers at full volume, when suddenly my brother (M22) came in and asked me to turn it off. I said "Why? Because we have bigger speakers downstairs? XD!" to which he replied with "No, it's because I'm trying to study right now, and also that music sucks ass." I couldn't believe it. I thought, "How could my own brother turn out to be an Eminem hater?" After a few seconds of initial shock, I quickly composed myself and let out a slight chuckle with a smirk on my face. "Clearly," I replied, "You have no idea what you're talking about. Listen to this and see if you change your mind." I proceeded to scroll through my playlist and found Rap God. It's over. I've won. I clicked on the song and skipped to the part where he raps really fast, then looked up at my brother to see what I was expecting to be a surprised reaction. Instead, what I saw was a confused expression on his face, before he switched to a shit-eating grin and burst into laughter. "You like this? This sucks, also I don't think mom would want you listening to something like this haha," he said.
I didn't even know how to react. That usually works on my friends, why wasn't my brother impressed by the fast part of Rap God? I was starting to get angry. I told him to stop laughing and put some respect on Eminem's name because he's the GOAT (greatest of all time). He started laughing even harder. I glared at him in disbelief. He kept laughing. I clenched my fists. He kept laughing. I audibly went "Grrrr!!" He kept laughing. I'd had enough. In a fit of rage, I ran up to him and sucker punched him right in the fucking teeth. Well, if that didn't wipe the smile off his face. He let out the ugliest scream I think I've ever heard, it was like "AEAAAAHHAHAOWW!" or something like that. I dunno, the "OWW!" part might have been a bit longer, I can't remember very well. At this point, my brother got pretty fucking pissed so he ran at me to hit me back, but thanks to my quick thinking, I was able to rip my Eminem poster off my wall and throw it at his face as a distraction. By the way, Rap God was still playing in the background as all this was happening. I ran outta my room and sprinted across the hall as fast as I could while my brother struggled to get that big ol' picture of Eminem off his face. I'd imagine there aren't many people in the world that can claim to have been assaulted by Eminem, but my brother is now one of them. As I was running down the hall I realized I had no idea where the fuck I was going, so I did what first came to mind and locked myself in the bathroom.
As I write this I'm sitting inside the bathtub while I wait for my brother to stop banging on the door. He's been there for like 10 minutes and I don't think he's going to stop. It's kinda funny though, because I punched his teeth in so bad that he's struggling to curse at me, he sounds like "FWUACKING PUNKAZZ BITSCH OPEN THE FWUACKING DOOR" so at least I got a kick outta that lol.
So yeah, AITA for punching him? I kinda feel bad about it but to be fair, he did disrespect Eminem, so I think it was justified. What do you think?
Credited to Xx_GenericName69_xX
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