The Skeleton Shotgun

Salutations Internet goers. My name Sylvester Rodreguez III. One night I was browsing the Internet. I was quite low on food in my system so I inquired my mom to make me a sandwich. Afterwards I went back to my living quarters. All of a sudden a file called pootis.exe downloaded to my porn folder. I was shocked.

No one does anything to my sexy folder! In anger I opened the file. What flashed on screen spooked my guts off. It said, "You are goignn to dead!". Then the electricity when off and my guts got really spooked off! My laptop was still on so I decided to play Battletoads 2 and disregarded the flashing messages on my computer. But then as I launched Battletoads2.exe, a window popped up saying :

"POOTIS DOESN'T ALLOW BATTLETOADS2.EXE."

I was furious! I got really mad so I started to bite my lightswitch. As I was chewing on the lightswitch I broke it off and then the light in my room came on and everything was red like jelly. A big fissure opened in the center of my room and a half naked janitor climbed out of it and gave me a shotgun.

He said, "Use this! You'll need it!" After he gave me the shotgun everything went hyper realistic.

A videogame HUD from Doom appeared in my vision. I walked out of my room. I was in the living room, it was dark and I heard, "HERE IS YOUR SANDVICH WITTLE MAN". It was the Heavy Weapons Guy from TF2! But, it was also my mom.

Because he was wearing the same clothes as her! I shot him with my gun and he died. Everything went back to normal and the shot de-materialized out of my hand. As I climbed over my couch to see what was left of the Heavy Weapons Guy. I found my mom. But not my normal mom. She was a skeleton. I knew it was my mom because the face structures matched. I cried tears and had a heart attack. So please guys. Don't launch POOTIS.exe!

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