Thomas the .EXEngine

Chapter 1:Backstory

When I was a wee lad at the age of 16 in 1993, my Grand Dad Grand Uncle told me to, "Get off my fat ass and find a fucking job, ya weeb." I was appalled at his vulgar vocabulary, but realizing I had no money, I had to get a job. He suggested to be a reviewer for Nintendo Power , he did work for Nintendo so getting in wouldn't be very hard.

Once me and my Gruncle made it to Nintendo of Americas HQ, we meet this dude behind a desk. My Gruncle talk to him for a while telling him about me and my obsession for "Teh Vidya Gaemz." The dude then gave me a little nod and went off to a little room behind the desk. I don't know why he went back their, I suppose to take a quick fap or something. Although, he came back with a Snes cartridges, no lable, only the words "THOMAS" in red marker. The dude gave me an amused expression telling me "Here" in a deep, monotone, mad, voice. Grand Uncle gave me a smile, we got chicken nuggies and went home.

Chapter 2: 11:00 A.M./THE (True) BEGINNING

Upon arriving home, I grabbed a note book and a pencil then went up stair in my room, where my SNES was. Before shoving the cartridge into the console violently, I looked over it carefully. The cartridge was more box like, with it's edges sharper than other ones and the lack of a title stick was slightly unsettling. "THOMAS" was the only word the cartridge had to say. I said to myself "This is total not weird or unsettling in the slightest way, so I shall shove this odd, bootleg looking cartridge into my completely normal SNES now." So shove it in I did.

The game started up, no title screen, no developers, no nothing (except the game because that would be weird [stupid]). Some train with a face came driving toward me in the television. But it stopped before it could hit me. It gave me a cold, dead look, and then faded to black. I recognized the train, his name was Thomas. Seeing his face made me a little happy inside. Also, after realizing that this is a children's game, I knew it would review to do. The game asked my age, I was bout to pic "8 or older," but my 6 year old brother walked in. He had a giggle fit about me playing a Thomas the Train Engine game. I told him my situation. I then realized I could easy way out by have him play the game and watch him.

"Hey, little Jimbo."

"Yis, big bwotha."

"Ya wanna play this game, I know you love Thomas."

"YAAAA!"

Chapter3: 11:15/IT HAPPENS (or some shit)

I NEED SLEEP :<

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