Assholes: Difference between revisions

so i was playing ded risieng 3 when half way through the game the main protagonist turned and looked at me and said why do you torture me?! i flipped off the screen and threw a chair at the tv breaking it because i did not want to hear his bullshit but then i realised that i cant play sanic 06 and yelled i called the repair guy and he said that he was on his way i heard someone ring my door bell  and it was the repair guys friend he said that the repair guy died two weeks ago i called him a lying bitch and stuffed him in my dish washer i was pretty hungry so i opened the freezer to get a pizza but there in the freezer was some asshat with pale skin and no eyes he had no teeth and ah upside down head he said im cold but i put the fucker in his place i got the pizza and put it in the oven when it was done some bitch carved your next into it i ate it but when i was done i heard footsteps upstairs i was so sick of everyones shit that i ran upstairs and looked in the closet and saw a teen with a white face a smile was carved into his face i was so pissed at him so i tore him in half and feed him to my chickens i heard a knock on my door and saw a kid on my door step he said do you want to play? i said no fag and kicked him in the jaw i realised that i left my bike in the woods so i put the kid who was still alive in the trash                                                                                                                                                                                all the trees in the woods were dead but i did not care i just wanted my bike i saw a man with a hat and a suit he said he kiddo you must be lost follow me i said fuck off and broke his arm and made him eat dog shit i found my bike but a tall man with no face was next to it i beat him down and took my bike on my way home i saw some guys around a fire they were wearing robes and chanting i kicked them all in the balls and sat down to eat a sandwich but then i realised that i had never had a bike.