Attack of the Bug-Eyed Coat Hanger: Difference between revisions

When I woke up the following morning, the coat hanger from the church house was standing right in front of me. I had no idea how it got there, but I dared not to find out. Then I heard the wooden footsteps from the night before. Paranoid, I turned around. I wish I hadn’t.

 

 

As I laid in the trunk, I was shocked to see that the coat hanger was laying right next to me. I picked it up and threw it out. The neighbor asked what the matter was and just as I turned to answer, I was even more shocked to see that the coat hanger was running right towards us. I told the driver to pick up speed and he did, losing the coat hanger as we speeded right past a police car.

Sitting right next to Goody Two-Shoes at the controls for what only felt like hours gave me the irresistible urge to massage her legs, arms, and abdomen; her skin was very smooth and warm. She didn’t mind this at all due to her sadomasochistic nature. Goody Two-Shoes actually had the heart to teleport me back to Hixson before zooming back to infinity and beyond via hyperspace, never to be seen again. My experience with that cute alien would be best described as a “Big-Lipped Alligator Moment;” a situation that comes right the heck out of nowhere, has little to no bearing whatsoever on the plot, is way over-the-top in terms of ridiculousness (even within the context of this creepypasta), and no one ever speaks of it again after it happens.

 

 

The coat hanger was back with its arms regenerated (although its hands were black this time around). I caught it in the act of shoving a bar of soap down my father’s throat. It turned its head to me and said “Your mother will be sucking stalagmites in the Inferno, Zimloki, you faithless slime!” Infuriated, I chased that coat hanger clear across the house until we got outside, where I took out an ax and hacked it to pieces. When I went back inside the house, I heard multiple wooden footsteps.