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Charles and the Sex Bomb Gone Wrong: Difference between revisions
Charles and the Sex Bomb Gone Wrong (view source)
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imported>Mr. Faff (Created page with "<nowiki>{{NSFW}}</nowiki> '''In the 1960s there was a man names Charles Wankton. He liked to stick his schlong where it didn't belong, yet he enjoyed long nights of choking h...") |
imported>Mr. Faff mNo edit summary |
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this would come back to haunt him. Literally.
air. Sighing, he went back indoors. Again, his favourite was an outdoor wank but after climaxing having seen old Mrs. Higgins' behind, she had told the
police who then made sure that he was house bound for at least 246 years. There was a sniper hiding at the bottom of his garden and lest he decide to come
outside to fap about bush he would doubtless be shot from his own bush, not to
be confused with all the shooting this would cause him to have all over his bush.
twofold, he shut the door. Damn them for bothering him, but at least he felt that sweet open air over his bellend.
and he was already in his patented lying down-wank position. He decided to wait out the phone and call them back later, right after his second go for the day.
But the phone would not stop ringing after climaxing. Irritated, he got out of
bed to answer the phone, "What the hell do you want? I'm doing something extremely important" he said as he caressed his erect penis. There was a hissed, disjointed voice that sounded familiar, "I know when you're fapping..." Nearly dropping phone and wang, Charels gasped and asked, "Is that you Great Grampa Wank?" You see, in his vast and fruitful family lineage the point when the family name became Wankton was after his great Grandad royally fucked his great Grandmother so hard it broke the bed, giving the nickname of their newly invented romp style 'the Ton'. And this was
such a romantic experience for them that they decided they would combine their last name with their creepy-arse sex style and forevermore the lineage would be
cursed, I mean blessed, with the name Wankton.
invented by me. And I know full well you've never actually made contact with a
woman sexually so I know you can't pull off 'the Ton'. This presents a problem, as my lineage needs to prove its worthy of its birthright by living up to its own name. If you can't slam dunk a bitch within the next thirteen weeks, I will swallow your soul... And seamen".''' '''
act. Either way, he needed to slam dunk a bitch and fast, lest he and his seamen be swallowed forever by his vengeful pervy Grampa's ghost.
get laid, otherwise my Grandfather and his haunted bellend will fuck me
instead". The woman answered, "I know who this is, you've called me
over and over for the past two years and I know exactly what you do while phoning. For the last time, never call here again". Charles exclaimed, "At least tell me about your underwear!" But she had already hung up. Charles was desperate now, he didn't have any money but he would try another route, like dialling a number for a certain 'massage parlour'. After dialling, they picked up; "Hello! My pussy wet for you long time! What can we do for you?"
please myself through you."
penis he searched for 'Dial-A-Ho'. But his IP was blocked after many payment bounces. Again, he needed a rethink. He got an idea. Yes, that would have to
do.
putting the head on his pillow, he got to work trying to make it look more realistic. He used an old mop for the hair and some makeup he had stashed for
his very freaky wank sessions he liked to have on special occasions. After he was satisfied, he got to business, trying to break the bed. But his work was in
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chew toy and wrapped it in bacon. The detonation could come at any time whilst he wildly thrust his manhood into the lifeless blow up doll while Grampa Wank watched eagerly, hoping he could finally pass on to the next world and fuck some heavenly bitches. But the explosives detonated, sending bits of rubber and
sinew everywhere. When the police came to investigate why his leg collar had
stopped its signal it looked like someone had filled a balloon with black powder and popped it all over the room. Except that probably isn't what it would look like and it would have been enough for them to hurl their lunch juices all over the room where so much other body fluid had been lost. James the RMC sniper would need a new job.
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